krissthesexyatheist

Message to GOP'ers, Shut Up Your Face

2012-01-27T11:14:00.000-08:00

Confession...I Googled "
Rick Santorum anal". I couldn't resist.

Like I said the other day a couple of posts ago...religion doesn't matter in a presidential candidate, until it matters. When does it matter...when they shove it down our throats, err, or when the media ask's questions about religion, which is what happened at the last GOP debate.

"What role would religion play in your presidency?"

We can't expect "honest" answers to this question. Really, what are they supposed to say, "God beams the answers down to me, after I pray, and that invisible laser beam of "answers" that is similar to that other invisible laser beam that beams down ethics-n-morals, understanding and goodness, tells me what to do." Don't hold yer atheist breadth fer that one.

Ron Paul, smartly, said it wouldn't have any affect at all on his presidency. On the other hand, The Newt basically said mere humans are too stupid to make the really important decisions...

"Because these are decisions beyond the ability of mere mortals to truly decide without some sense of what it is that we should be doing...we have a real obligation to recognize that, if your truly faithful, it's not just an hour on Sundays...It's in fact something that should suffuse your life, to be part of who you are. And in that sense, it is inextricably tied in with how you behave."

I Googled "dominionism" and this unholy trinity came up. Go figure.

Wow, thanks Newt thanks for all that fuel to the atheist fire. I couldn't have scripted it better myself. So where to begin...

Not only is it Team Atheist that does NOT want an American Christian dominionist, with their believing fingers near that nuclear button that can destroy the whole world with , well, their finger near the button...it is the whole world. It's so basic. If a president of the United States does not believe in earthly and human reasoning and critical thinking skills and does believe that a 1/3 man, God, ghost is coming back within "our" lifetime, after the state of Israel is established and that natural disasters which, well, occur naturally and with frequency, IS a sign the prophecy is being fullfilled, which means that the end of the world as we know it is coming soon and that the people that just happened to subscribe to that one correct religion (outta so many, and it's definitely not the Jews. Sorry you guys are just pawns in the American evangelical prophecy) will literally rise up into the air (ascension) to meet their maker while the rest of the world suffers for the rest of eternity...(if a president believes that) then the probability that a delusional human president will in reality destroy the erffs as we know it...increases. And why, because according to The Newt...mere humans are too dumb and cannot make important decisions like that themselves.

I'll end by letting The Newt, the man that single handily has destroyed the institution of hetero marriage while at the same time inhibiting the good peeps of the LGBT community (like his sister) from getting even one marriage under their belt...

"One of the reasons I am running is there has been an increasingly aggressive war against religion and in particular against Christianity in this country, largely by largely by a secular elite and the academic news media and judicial areas (RNS)."

Thanks Newt.

* The always really good Religion News Service Blog (whomps all over CNN Belief Blog-I don't know why it's more popular. I bet Gawd is involved.

* When I played Ju-Co tennis back in the day the mens' team often times practiced with he women's team. There were international hotties on the womens team and english wuz there second language. In the heat of the battle when line calls were being made, scores "not recalled correctly", under the hot Sacramento sun they would say, "Shut up your face." So totally hot coming from a 6ft, toned blond tennis player.

Not Win By Attrition

2012-01-27T09:03:00.000-08:00

Ugh, ugh...super ugh and sheez. Is part of their plan to win by attrition. Last man standing wins, the last philosophy remaining takes the metaphorical...all that winners keep talking about. Like I have said many times, to fight the same battles over and over in the war against, let's say, a woman's right to choose, separation of church and state and the bad ol' battle for the science classroom called creationism, is stupid had and a waste of time (but totally needed).

An Indiana Senate committee passed a horrible bill that would allow schools to teach creationism along side evolution in the science classroom. Did I say stupid head already. Forget that there is already legal precedent in favor of the athei...err, I mean science, something like the law never stops religion. Fortunately the super awesome ACLU is on the scene. I guess they do not want individual schools-with uber American Christian school board members that probably do not have an understanding of basic science, but did read, I dunno, Kirk Camerons latest God book-deciding if their particular religion is represented in the science classroom.

They have the slogan Teach The Controversy (that was "them", this is us) but of course that is just typical American Christian hijacking, again. The implication is that those sneaky scientists are hoarding the truth and keeping the real truth away from those poor innocent students because they only wanna teach their Dawin's scripture, evolution. That's what they say.

What I say is that the only thingy controversial is that they are attempting to inject American Christianity into the science classroom, again. It was decided long ago that creationism and Intelligent Design are merely bad camouflage for American Christianity and any attempt to teach Genesis as a theory of the origin of the universe and peeps of da erffs is a violation of church and state. Theoretically, if schools were to *teach the controversy* then each science classroom in every school would hafta teach every creation myth from every culture that ever lived ever ever. Part of their controversy is that the other theories that are equal to evolution are being ignored and not being given equal time (even tho there are no other theories).

Really "they" want other perfectly normal adults to believe that da erffs is flat, 6-10,000 y/o, humans and dinosaurs walked side by side, humans were perfectly formed right from the beginning, Adam and Eve are responsible for all the genetic diversity in the whole world, should I go on...snakes talk, homo's are bad, LGBT marriage somehow affects straight marriage to the extent that it will be destroyed, fossils were put there by Satan to tempt and test you, the Great Flood really happened, JC WIL come back to da erffs within "our" lifetime and "they" want to replace beautiful science with all this crap-o-la and more. Just say no Indiana.

I think the only thing that is controversial is that there are adults out there that think the disguises' in the names called creationism and Intelligent Design will FOOL other adults into thinking that there is a controversy in the first place. I think it's controversial that even a stupid person can do the simple math of the "equal time" argument and see that it is the definition of NOT PRACTICAL OR POSSIBLE. I guess that makes the Indiana Senate members that very stupid headed-ly passed the bill that is gonna waste everyone's time, again, for a battle that has already been fought...and won...by us....Team Athei...err, Team Science.

* Yea buddy, you know I wuz reading the radio station Eagle County 99.3 FM for my news.

* H/T to @lukegeog (#teambro member, majoring in geology, battler of creationist nonsense)...article

The Stupid, Alaskan Airlines and Prayer Cards

2012-01-26T11:57:00.000-08:00

Gordon Bawker the co-founder of Starbucks and delicious Redhook Ale, used to travel on Alaskan Airlines. AA, until recently, would drop a freekin' prayer card on your diner tray (I know, it's the 2,000's right). I can sort of forgive himfor putting small coffee shops outta business (not really) because he would remain silent, then when the plane took off, then he would recite the prayer out loud. I don't know you, but I don't want people sayin' out loud on this flying-sky-chair-tube thing, the thing that possible could crash and kill everyone, "the meek shall inherit the erffs (that or, "we're all gonna dieeeeeee.").

Do my Eskimo bro's and sis' really want their 'mugs' of planes. Were they even asked?

Here's the super stupid coming from the upper echelon, 1%'er's, the CEO and the president...

"...we've heard from many of you who believe religion is inappropriate on an airplane." Ugh, ya think. This is everything to me. This is the difference to an apologetic Kriss 2011 and angry atheist Nu Kriss, bitter, angry and in yo face, beeotches. Last year at this time, i might have let it pass without a thought. now, no frackin' way.

This should be a prayer card. It's inspiring.

Instead of "inappropriate behavior on a plane" I think dude should have said the correct and said, public place. People should be better than this, esp people in leadership positions. Really, did any Jews, Mooslims, or atheists eveah travel on Alaskan Airlines. It only takes common sense to see that that is inconsiderate at best. Here;s the other part of the quote the two brainiacs came up with in their memo...

"This difficult decision was not made lightly...Some of you enjoy the cards and associate with our service..."

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. This is what I was talking about earlier with the plus one. Really...really, there were customers/people that associated doing your job, the thing that everyone has to do, doing your job correctly and well (everyone is expected to do that and when you do, you don't get credit, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DO THAT.) with those stupid prayer cards (name them, I doubt it). You go to work and do your job and it is a choice to give credit to God afterwards, not a requirement (See previous post).

I Googled "prayer cards."

This is also Christian privilege. Some "higher up" decided long ago that s/he would promote their religion (after all, what's the harm, right) so they insisted and implemented giving out prayer cards to customers on a public flight, irregardless of belief or lack of.

It's not that big of deal-eo tho. It's only been happening sicne the 70's and years ago, to save money, they only gave the cards out in first class. I guess only the 1% can be saved.

* There is an article about this on NPR, but I'm linking the mighty Seattle Times instead.

Real Knowledge Plus God Equals...

2012-01-26T10:33:00.000-08:00

This is the fucker that took me down. If you were any older, son, I'd kick your ass. In fact...go get your dad, boy.

The only good thing to come outta having that violent puking that happens when you eat something that is not quite right is that your six pack feels so tight the next day. Other than that, like the horrible watering of the mouth right before you puke, the puking while people are walking by, the dude rolling up on you asking over and over "are you all right, are you all right (shut the fuck up dude. I appreciate it and all, but can't you see I'm puking. It's really selfish of you to want me to stop puking just so I can answer you. Just sayin.'), the realization that nothing is coming out, because everything already left your stomach, the sweating right after and, well, you guys know...right. Any who....

Atheist don't plus one.

I'm going to go all stream of hazy consciousness on this one today, feeling kinda weak right now. Ritt Momney's good twin brother, the one that wants to win the contest to be the one to lose in the up coming election against super awesome Black Prez, is down with the foreveah judge, God, and his after the fact laws. Forget that his God and Prophet are different than the American Christian God, as an atheist, when I read stuffs like this...all I see is God.

"Don't claim equality as that gift from God and then go around and say, "Well, we don't have to pay attention to what god wants us to do.We don't have to pay attention to God's moral laws. If your rights come from God, then you have an obligation to live responsibly in conforming in God's laws, and our Founding Fathers said so, right." Mitt Romney and his fantastic underwear.

Maybe they are just doing "alternative Chinese medicine."

I call this the plus one. The believers plus one. It's an add on...after the fact. It's an unneeded attachment that doesn't help anything. After all God hasta be in injected in there somewhere. Take any explanation for anything, look at all the (real) work that goes into it , then inject the "explanation" of God at the end (1). Look atheist, forget that things like reciprocal altruism, sharing, kindness, helping peeps, Team Spirit, relationships etc...all happened naturally (evolution of group behavior thru natural selection) back in the day when our ancestors went form individual lame-oz to hunter gather'ers and then agriculture peeps. Forget that shit, "God did it."

Equality is not a gift from that invisible God that believers insist we believe in. What is equality anyway, a revolution from oppression of one to to the demanding of *equality*, then eventually the acceptance and practice of said equality. I don't see God there. I see an "idea" that thru human effort, came to fruition. Of course you can always add God, inject God into this or anything, at the end.

Humans for all our faults-n-stuff are still very amazing. For example, we have the capacity for love, great super loving love. We can choose to plus one God into that equation after the fact, but we don't need to. Because hella time has passed and we have that evolved human brain, humans have developed ethics, morals, rulez to live by and rulez to NOT live by. We know what is right and what is wrong, and by golly, we do not need to plus one a great surveillance camera in the sky, a judge and jury, a ghost or a warden, an oppressor, into the equation where human already have the answer.

(1). How are babies born (insert all the knowledge about reproduction, all the medical stuffs here), then plus one God at the end. How do the tides work, why is the sky blue, why do families look alike, how come the Denver Broncos made it to the playoffs, any question with an answer that involves real knowledge that is based in the physical and material world we live in, a world that adheres to the concepts and principles of physics and chemistry, then place God at the end of the answer as if that is equal in explaining the mechanisms of how things work. That is the plus one.

* Oopsie, I made a mistake. I'm really really "hazing" if i'm making this one. It was not Underwear that made that quote, it was jizz, dookie and whatever else oozing outta my butt. My bad everyone.

* Quote

* Article

That Stupid Cross On Government Land

2012-01-25T11:10:00.000-08:00

Oh...oh oh oh, OH oh....I think they hafta go (that was my attempt at a joke*). Well, maybe they just don't understand, you know, the constitution, the law of the land-n-stuff.

"Reporting from Washington—

The House on Tuesday approved a measure that seeks to permit religious symbols on federal war memorials, a response to a court ruling that declared a cross atop a San Diego memorial violated the Constitution (link)."

"They" should use info from Zeitgeist and debate that the cross is a universal symbol and not a Christian symbol. funny.

What's the big deal-eo anywho, it's just a FREEKIN CROSS on government land and nobody relates that to Christianity. Sure there is all that church-n-state stuff but I wanted to address something else. A couple of months ago, and a couple of articles ago-I think it was in a comment section-a soldier said something like...they didn't even fight in a war and they will never go on base to see it, so WTF. I fought and I like it. So there. Me, "ugh."

"Thanks for fighting for us soldier. now we can eat freedom fires, " Fat American white kid.

What is dude sayin'. I get the impression from that comment, and others like it (and there are many like minded, peeps) is that soldier dude has a little more say in it than Joe civilian. He's fought and he's served, he's Christian, so dagnabit...it's OK by him. Perhaps he's even the kind that will cry religious persecution and claim that his religious freedom has been hijacked by those secularists, by people that interpret the constitution different than he (perhaps, I dunno, just sayin'). These are the kinda peeps that also say things like, "Well, if you don't like this country, then git out!" Whoa Nelly....c'mon now.

Believers have hijacked many thingies that belong to everyone. For example one cannot be "spiritual" or have a transcendent experience if one does not believe in the correct religion (preferably American Christianity...for white people....dudes only. No "bundles of sticks."). The word "life" or "pro life" was stole by the pro lifers. Automatically, if you are against them, then you are against "life (then we halfta waste time explaining the opposite.sheez). Which brings me to this...

"Bundle of sticks." I thought it was funny.

If you do not subscribe to the American Christian God of American Exceptionalism and dominionism, then there is no way that you can be patriotic. No way. It's impossible. YOUUUUU do not have that invisible laser beam of patriotism (similar to the laser beam of the ability to love. No God, no ability to love for you, you heathen.) being sent into your incapable mere earthly self. We cannot have simple appreciation and gratitude for all the brave men and women that have sacrificed for the general public's freedom. We are not capable according to soldier dude.

So because we will never go on base to see this particular violation of church and state and because he did what he was supposed to do, which is follow orders because he signed up for that (and he happens to be Christian), then he has a little more right than you and I and he is justified in not following the constitution.

NOT

* That was supposed to be Led Zepplin

Babies Drinking Beer

2012-01-25T09:15:00.000-08:00

How could I possibly top the post Animals Drinking Beer...You know I hadta Google...Babies drinking beer.

I tried the drinking method...it didn't work for me.

You know what Tommy..there's gotta be more to life than this. I mean, c'mon man.

These kids now rule the country. Stupid baby boomers.

4 outta 5 Asian kids in the rural mountains drink beer.

She left me, that bitch. I'm never opening my heart again. Never I tell ya.

I wuz just resting my eyes.

Bro, lite my refry.

This guy, this guy is the guy. I love you, mommy.

Believe it or not, Coors Lite is way better than Coors.

MGD makes me sleepy also.

We're swingers.

Fosters mate. It's Australia for kangaroo.

Fat Mexican father of the year.

I can drive, just shut the fuck up and poor me another one.

I'm so funny...my brother is a comedian. buy his stuff on iTunes...Kevin Camia

Butt Hurt In Colorado

2012-01-25T07:54:00.000-08:00

Oops, we did it again. That is we went all atheist and human and expressed our belief/views and guess what...they got mad. This simple billboard has caused an uproar in Colorado.

I'm getting really tired of this crap-ola. We did not insult anyone, they chose to allow themselves to be all butt hurt. The Colorado Coalition Of Reason wants to let other atheists in Colorado know that they are not alone and also to open channels for dialogue. It seems simple enuff, but we are dealing with irrational religion, folks.

I've said it a million times and I will keep sayin' it until the cows come home or whatevah that sayin' is. The time for religious privilege is over, over I tell you. We are called militant atheists but we carry no weapons (I guess you can throw a book at someone), meanwhile God's American Christian army has killed many and is killing many right now. Wars are fought in the name of Gawd, but never not once in the name of atheism.

Believers are insulted that we call their God imaginary, but there has never been proof that a God, any of the many Gods, exist. Belief is based on faith and any thinking person should be insulted that they are expected to believe in an invisible God when it goes against...reason.

The peeps in Colorado do not want to take away anyone's faith...they just want believers to stop shoving it down their throats.

Good luck mountain, homies.

* Article and video

* Colorado Coalition Of Reason

Tommy Jefferson And That Bible

2012-01-24T08:44:00.000-08:00

I thought it was kinda funny that the author of this piece says sumthin' like Who the heck knows about the Jefferson Bible anyways....Team Atheist of course. If you're new to the convo-n-stuff here's the nutshell...Tommy Jefferson, dude that was all influential in writing THAT constitution that Team Secular keeps talking about, *rewrote* the bible by taking out all the stupidstition like the no sex birth, angels, and coming back from the dead like a flesh and brain eating zombie.

You know I hadta Google "brain eating zombie..." and congratulations, miss.

President Jefferson was called an infidel during the 1800 race and you can imagine the uproar a book like that would cause back in the day (hell, imagine if that was done now. Can you say death threat, assassination). It wasn't until hella years after Tommy's death that the book was found and published. I guess he wanted to stay alive as long as possible, that is why he told very few people about it (smart on his part.).

So what's left. All the good stuff I guess. Look man, I'm not one of those atheist that claim there is nothing good in the bible. I'm one of those atheist that says we have only been looking at the good stuff in the bible for 2,000 years and because The New Atheists are here, we NOW halfta pay attention to all the stupidhead stuffs in the bible: superstition, genocide, killings in general, intolerance, sexism and stupidhead, again. The free pass has expired. That is what I'm sayin'.

Jefferson believed that the moral teachings of JC was okilie-dokilie. Unfortunately for Tommy, if he ran for president today he would have no chance. In a way it is a total shame that he didn't publish his bible back in the day. I wonder how much further along our great country and the world would be if a non-superstitious Christianity evolved instead of the ghost, angels and demons version that is dividing this country.

“In extracting the pure principles which he taught,” Jefferson wrote in 1813, “we should have to strip off the artificial vestments in which they have been muffled by priests, who have travestied them into various forms. ... There will be found remaining the most sublime and benevolent code of morals which has ever been offered to man.”

* Article
.

Cat's And Other Animals Drink Beer

2012-01-23T20:41:00.000-08:00

I got all of these off of Buzz Feed. The most amazing of all is that....cat's drink beer. Really. Enjoy.

Fosters is Australian for...Budweiser.

Hey, pur-die ladies...get on (you know what I mean).

Little know fatc...this is why bunnies have so many bunnies.

Anteater(?). Really.

Armadillo (?). Really.

Kriss...this guy is the guy. Kriss, I heart you man...you're good people, really I mean that...gooood (barf)...

Don't "No kitty me, humoon. Shut the fuck up and piss in your pants. sleep..sllleeeppp, ssslllleeeeeppppp."

Kriss dog at 4:30am. Sorry, but true. G-nite all.

I didn't blog today...except this....and there's no God (and I've been drinking).

#teambro

The Kalam Argument and Myyyyyyy Forty Niner's

2012-01-22T10:42:00.000-08:00

Kriss, don't watch the game today...OK, baby.

Believe it or not...I'm totally human. I have the whole range of human emotions (thanks Prozac), thoughts and feelings. I know I'm a martial arts baddass-n-stuff, but really...there are times when I get scared...there are times when I'm irrational (sorry to burst your bubble). In fact, months ago I frackin' prayed (1). Today, Sunday, err, I dunno the date, I will once again show my irrational-ness and subscribe to superstition-y-ness, in the form of the very childish and illogical-jinx. You see, kind gentle and very good looking readers, try as I may to NOT watch sports and NOT be a fan (which comes from the word fanatic), just like an alcoholic in a liquor store...I'm drinking the cool aid called this seasons freekin Fory Niner's.

For pretty much the last decade, I have watched every pathetic game of every season and with love in my heart for my guys...The Phoney Niner's (I routed for frackin' Cody Picket. Cody Picket. Sheez). They are Phoney no more. In fact, they are hella good. 13-3 is above and beyond what it takes to win the pathetic NFC West and today they are a gonna play the NY Giants in the NFC Division Championships-winner goes to that Superbowl that sports fanatics always talk about. Here's the skeptic catch...

I have not watched a Niner's game all season and the one game I did watch involved the fourth member of the trinity and his team the Denver Broncos with, Timmy Tebow (he won on last second heroics. Thanks Jesus). Look, if you don't follow sports or ever played sports then I can't explain what a fan is or our irrational behavior. All I know is that I haven't watched a Niner's game all year, they had a great winning year, and I know in my heart that if I watch the game today...they will lose. Lemmie put it this way for all you brainiacs out there.

i. I have not watched a Niner game all season.
ii. They have had a great a winning season, therefore
iii. If I watch today, they will lose.

Does this look familiar to anyone. It should....

i. Everything has a beginning
ii. The universe has a beginning, therefore
iii God exists

Kinda makes me wonder...who is William Lane Craig's team.

Go Niner's.

* If you're not on Team Atheist of Team Believer...it is called the Kalam cosmological argument....stupid.

(1) So sue me. I was in a lot of pain and I prayed to God, or anyone that would listen, to relieve my suffering. Wanna know what happened...it got worse. Dam, that nonexistent Gawd sure does work in mysterious ways. Go Niner's.

"It Came From "Something", Or Not

2012-01-21T13:00:00.000-08:00

When I first started the six pack blog just over two years ago, I wuz all like all educational and informative-n-stuffs. This last year I moved to shorter funnier, sarcastic, angry atheist-y and more entertaining post. Today, I will attempt some brainiac-ness in that I discovered sumthin' new and eyez iz gonna try and share it because it is the ultimate question (yes, THAT ultimate question. no not if I'm single).

One of the problems with religion is that...they already have the answers-it's God. It never changes, doesn't want to, it claims to have all the answers and it is totally wrong (that's the sound of the God in the Gaps getting smaller and smaller). Beautiful and wonderful science on the other hand is endless in the seeking of answers. If a question is answered, then a million gazillion will replace that (and that is the way it should be). But what about that endeavor philosophy, the endeavor I honestly and admittedly do not know much about.

Maybe we are one bubble, that came from another bubble...in a bubble bath with a dog into that has cucumbers over it's eyes(?).

Robot Voice (Stephen Hawking) in his latest super awesome book said that philosophy is dead concerning the great questions and physics whomps all over it. While it is true that physics has hella answers, and I'll just say it, truths, I do not believe that it can explain everything and not only that, it is not the only vehicle to get us there. Theoretical physics IS looking into that super great question...what came before the big bang (1) and perhaps, just perhaps, philosophy can answer that.

So how do you answer the question...How does something come from nothing? At one moment there was no universe, then the next moment...universe, baby. To say that God is the answer to that question does not explain any of the philosophy of the "hows" and "whys (the answer of God is more like a statement, not an explanation-which is what an answer is) or the mechanisms of the whole deal-eo.

The really super great The Atlantic monthly delves into this, and very well I might add. How can something come from nothing. Well, one idea is that it didn't go down like that (there was nothing and then God made something-voila the universe and besides that...2nd law of thermodynamics, yo). Perhaps we came from a different universe, a bubble universe. Perhaps we are like those sands on a beach (this is from my teenage punk rock stoner years) and one grain of sand, produced the next. Maybe we are one bubble in a bubble bath, and we do not even see the other bubbles, or an "atom" within an "atom". Perhaps we a "something" that is within and infinite amounts of "something." Whatevah "it" is..."it" came from something, not nothing (or not).

Sort of looks like a Jackson Pollock painting, but he was tired or sumthin'...or outta paint.

Philosophy, and science for that matter, may never conclusively answer the question...but at least they are trying (as opposed to the audaciousness of religion that claims to already have the answer. Arrogant I tell ya). We live in a physical universe that has physical laws that we all adhere to (that 2nd law of thermodynamics that we keep talking about). So the answer must be within that, right, yes, no, maybe (?). Because the question was never answered, it just keeps coming back, or rather, it never went away (because God in not a good answer).

The thingy about it is, and this is the hard part for believers 1) we do not yet know how the universe came to be, 2) we do not even know what we do not know, 3) only science and philosophy acknowledges #2 and is actively seeking an answer for #1 and #2 and 4) we might never know the answer and that is OK (unless you are a believer) because it is also the journey (that is the admitting and stating the question, then looking for the answer) as well as a destination.

It's a journey to the truth and the truth is we may not eveah find the answer to the question "What happened before the big bang (first cause)", but dagnabit...if you are a carbon based life form and do not subscribe to superstition, literal mythology and are relatively normal in that you use critical thinking and reasoning skills (rather than blind, unquestioning faith), then....it is so human for us to try.

* Check out the interview with cosmology philosopher, Tim Maudlin, in that rag my dead hero used to write for, The Atlantic Monthly. We never met, bro, but I miss ya Hitch (if there is a heaven, then I hope yer up there annoying the shit outta the fraud known as Mother Teresa...and having a couple too many drinks.

* Mama-T (that's Mother Teresa) in SF Weekly.

(1) This is the biggest of biggest questions concerning the God in the Gaps. First they told us that god created everything and we believed it. Then awesome science came along and said, first there was the big bang, abiogenesis happened, then evolution thru natural selection. If this last mystery can be solved, then there will be no more gaps and here will be no more God. The question: How can something (the universe) come from *nothing*.

The young Stevo and hottie wife. OK, I guess I'll be the only weirdo that asks this, even tho everyone also thinks this one...What kinda sex are the Hawkins into. Or just like the question, what was before the big bang, what are the hows, the whys, the 'mechanisms'. I'm not talkin' shit...I was just wondering how they "do it."

Newt's Lying Eyes

2012-01-20T09:16:00.000-08:00

You know how when we were self righteous believers and we would call out people by sayin' "Don't judge. that is only for god." Remember that...well, I'm not a believer anymore.

The tale of The Newt is just getting better and better and by better and better I mean worse and worse. Really, this common gigolo could potentially be the next president of the United States. I must be dreaming. The latest escapade of Mr. Free Love himself, The Newt Baby, involves...well, free love. The Newt's entertainment value is rising because his private life is looking like erotica. Is it his millionth wife that recently said that The Newt wanted that open relationship the more liberal and secular world is OK with. Yea I think so.

The thingy about it is is that The Newt is not liberal or secular. Recently he said that secularism is one of the reasons why America is not the superpower it used to be (he didn't say that, but he meant it). Of course he is a Family Values guy. Everyone is talking about his Clinton years and that fine. Unfortunately for The Newt all his media coverage makes him look like a hypocrite.

Look man, a candidates person life and religion do not matter when they are running for office...except for when they do matter. The Newt has been married three times, but his lesbian sister, who wants to get married, cannot even get one.

"It's not my place to judge anyone, but it frustrating as hell that there are people-my brother included-that are able to enjoy marriage equality more than once," The Newt's lesbian sister.

I'll judge. First of all Callista, if that is her real name, in NOT all that and second and most important...You're a hypocrite. Dam bro, why you do your sis' like that.

* The New Yorker.

Update: Walker Texas Ranger (that's his name, right) talked to God and told him (Chuck Norris fact #1099238450912834098 Chuck Norris tells god what's up, no the other way around) that he is endorsing The Newt. Secondly...Callista is still not that hot. Baby, there is something called pigment, hello. I'm mean i like white girls, but sheez girl, you iz so white you are transparent. that's really white.

"Hello, Callista. Yea this is Michele...you have crazy beautiful eyez. Call me. My closet gay husband is shopping for sunglasses for the dog, again...with his personal assistant from the Philippines...Poppie. Thanks."

Fatwa Suckville

2012-01-20T08:19:00.000-08:00

Oh man I almost forgot...they still wanna kill the Rush Man, Salaam Rushdie. I was uninterested in these kinda things when that fatwa was put out on him back in the day for writing Satanic Verses-in fact I don't know specifically why The Religion of Peace wants to kill him.

"I have now been informed by intelligence forces...that paid assassins from the Mumbai underworld may be on their way to Jaipur to eliminate me, " Salman Rushdie.

That's suckville.

The Poor Guy (1)

(1) I really do feel sorry for him. He just wrote something and is death-threat-ed for the rest of his life. Must be tuff. Thanks Religion of Peace.

* Article Guardian UK

Linky Link Linkville Of The Atheist Variety

2012-01-19T08:48:00.000-08:00

My reader is totally awesome today. The last couple of months of last year it seemed to me that the atheist blogosphere was getting smaller as well as the amount of everyday bloggers. I subscribe to a million gazillion blogs and everytime I find a new one, no matter how small or new it is...I subscribe to it. Today, I'm proud to announce, my reader is killin' today.

Sounds laborious to me. I'd rather have experience, ya know, an equal.

Peeps, if I have said it once, I have said it so many times, the civil rights movement, the LGBT movement and the feminist movement are the pioneers to The New Atheists. We can learn from their struggles and success. Blackfemlens, today, reminds us of the Jan 22 anniversary of Roe v. Wade (yes, THAT Roe v. Wade). Together we can do this thing.

If Andy ran for president...I would totally vote for him. President of what, I dunno, tho. I really heart Andy's approach to that atheist blogging I keep talking about...he subscribes to The Funny. Top 10 thingies to say to a minister (besides fuck off) is a great example of what he does day in day out over at Laughing in Purgatory. Great work Internet bro.

I read an article a while back about how charts and pie charts are replacing wordy articles. Well a picture says 1,000 words and in this case (my blog mentor @vjack) it is plain simple and to the point. Also check out his Paper.li the mighty Atheist revolution Daily. So frackin' good.

No one will evah replace my deceased hero, Hitch...but Stephen Law would be on the short list of candidates. Lemmie see if I get this correct...He was a cab driver, now he has a Phd. in Philosophy, he is such a baddass that he debated W.L. Craig (I'm using my memory on this one, is that correct or not), he teaches at Oxford and today he has a vid of xtians booing Ron Paul because he mentioned The Golden Rule (that is the rule that precedes xtianity).

I'm rather envious of the Team Atheist members that are smart enuff to do biblical interpretation. Last year there was that one dude that did 365 bible and (fuck I forgot what her blog is called) that awesome woman that chronicles how many times women are mentioned in the bible and in what context (always refereed to as cattle or something to own and kill and rape. thanks bible). The Blasphemous Blog of Biblical Blunders not only has a catchy name...it also has content.

Hey atheists, should we hold out tongue and NOT speak up and out about religious oppression, bigotry, violence and hatred. I don't think so and neither does JesusFetusFajitaFishsticks. Rather inspiring post.

What no helmet. Another example of religious privilege.

My Internet friend down under (and that's NZ baby) has got it so correct. To know them is to debate them...and win. I get Christian newsletters and read Christian newspapers and books and so does my man. He loves the punishment. Thanks, bro.

I can go on and on but I'll end with a two-fer from super awesome atheist mommy (in Scotland I believe), @weesue. Are the brains of atheist and religious folk different and How do atheists find meaning in life. Ex Fundamentalist is an atheist/religious news hub. I do a lot of reading in the morning and obviously to me, Sue does a lot more. If you are pressed for time but want hella atheist/religious news...this is your spot.

Why did atheists and agnostics outperform the whole world of believers in religious knowledge in that 2010 Pew Religious Survey? Why did we become atheists in the first place. Because we have the desire for knowledge and seek the truth.

Keep reading buddies.

* All pics from the awesome LOL god.

Kansas House Speaker, Don't Pray For Me

2012-01-18T10:13:00.000-08:00

Sheez. There is nothing more patriotic than America's religion...Christianity. And there is nothing that says "I sure do love this country" than wanting the awesome Black Prez (Obama) to...die. That is exactly what Kansas house speaker Mikey O'Neal wants.

Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore and...I like UR albums.

Mikey recently passed around an email calling for the power of imprecatory prayer and the death of President Obama. They always use their standard Psalm 109 to do this. Here's some highlights from the Prince of Peace's hit album...Psalm 109.

Hold not thy peace...
Set thou a wicked man over him
and let Satan stand at his right hand
let him be
let his days be few
and let another man take his office
let his children be fatherless,
and his wife a widow....

He also talked smack about the hottie, err, the first lady. Loser.

There's more, unfortunately there is always more negativity and hate and violence when religion is concerned, but ya get the picture. Mikey wants the president dead. Plain and simple. What is also plain and simple is religious hate. It is always us v. them. It is always our way or you die (1). Believe what we believe, or die. Many peeps that have not participated in the conversation that the New Atheists (Team Atheist) started do not know this (and that is one of the many reason why Team Atheist is so important and needed. I heart you guys).

Please do not pray for me...I wanna live. thanks.

The secular crowd desires a religion free public square and that is fair for everyone. We do not not want you to practice your beliefs...we just don't want it in the public square. Many peeps not involved in that conversation I keep talking about often times ask "What's the harm, just leave believers alone. They have never done anything to you." And to that I respond, "Well, I guess...except all the attempted controlling of others that is at the core of all belief systems, except the bigotry and hate directed at the LGBT community, people of different beliefs or no belief, the war on women and the attempted control of their bodies and of course...the *patriotic* endeavor of praying for the presidents death just because you don't agree with his policies (or you just hate him because he is awesome Black).

What's the harm? I guess in this case...just death. Sheez.

* Psalm 109

* Article about Mikey.

* Article from 09' called Does God answer prayers to do someone ill?

(1) Yes, of course I'm totally aware that not all religion is like this, but so what. The time for religion, all of them, to get a free pass is over (thanks New Atheists). All human endeavors are subject to criticism and scrutiny, this includes religion. The time for cherry picking the only positive parts out of religion and putting it on display are over. Over I tell you.

Secular Boots Up Yer Arse

2012-01-18T09:21:00.000-08:00

If you look up the definition of Christian double speak...this case in Wilmington, Delaware should be right there, bro-skies. I don't know what else to call it. Perhaps, cake and eating it to, or my classic "WTF", or the good ol' "now I've seen everything." Here's the short of it.

Some really cool peeps want the Sussex County Council to stop sayin' the Lord's Prayer before meetings. Very stupidly they protested (of course, after all this is God's America) and all they could come up with is the super lame (say this in an exasperated, frustrated and childish voice)..." BUT IT'S TRADITION (1)." Of course to adults like you and I, that is not the passing of that mustard the cool kids mention from time to time. So they came up with something better...and by better I mean "Come on Christian, you're making all the good cool Christians that are smart and normal look stupid. Sheez."

It's so dumb-head I'm probably gonna get it wrong, but it goes like this...The Lords Prayer, you know "Our father who art in heaven...", is not a Christian prayer, because Jesus was a Jew and at that time Christianity as we know it today simply did not exist...therefore it is OK that we continue sayin' the Lord's Prayer before meetings. Now go away you mean secularists....why are you guys still here.

Ya know, kind gentle and very good looking readers, I was raised Catholic and I said the Lord's Prayer all the time and it is my humble opinion that the prayer called The Our Father is totally...Christian.

WTF. Really?

Let's run down this quickly....It comes from the Christian New Testament, you halfta say hella them after confession (plus Hail Marry's and not the football variety)...oh fuck it, let's check out the actual prayer.

It starts...Our (Christian) Father, who art in heaven (that the Christian god allegedly created), Hallowed be thy name (because you are the Christian God and Jesus and a ghost at the same time), Thy kingdom (America?) come, thy will will be done on earth (that the Christian God also created), As it is in heaven (that is only for white Christians, no Joo's, or Moo-slums, and deff. no super hot and smart atheists). OK now that I read it like this I guess it's not a Christian prayer...NOT.

I Googled "dumb head" and this came up.

Still, they claim that the prayer is *generic* (even tho it comes from the Gospel of Matty-Ice, that's Matthew). Really, I feel sorry for all the good, normal and not stupid Christians out there. In fact, c'mon y'all...regulate yourselves...otherwise Team Secular is a gonna halfta put some boots on...and ya know where that goes (2).

(1). The ...but it's tradition excuse/reasoning is so dumb-head. Just because something is *tradition* doesn't mean it's correct. It used to be tradition to hit kids in school, or you wife. Slavery was a *tradition* all around the world...so there. Fuck you're tradition.

(2) Up your cheating and unfair butt.

* In case it's not burned into your memory...The Lord's Prayer.

Skeptic Meters, Breathing And My Beautiful Philippines

2012-01-17T10:16:00.000-08:00

What can I say...I'm one of those super smart and great looking/sexy, know it all skeptics (and so are y'all, well, only if yer on Team Skeptic) so when I discover sumthin'...I'm totally surprised. As you all know I totally heart my beautiful Philippines so much. So they have religious wars, seemingly no separation of church and state and the poverty...oh the poverty, so what. So what that they brag about being the most Catholic nation in S.E.Asia. So what that the witch doctor (daitu) and their *alternative medicine* is still used in many barangays today. This is where I draw the line tho...Buteyko.

So WTF is Buteyko, I'm mean besides bull of the shit...it's breathing; specifically breathing thru the nose, and sometimes hyperventilating. Really peeps I always tell people this, if anyone were to see/feel chi it would be the Asian guy that grew up, err, Asian and studied martial arts (c'est moi). No offense but when white people try and tell me about tai chi and chi gung I roll my eyes. I was the poster boy for alternative medicine at one point. If ginseng and echinachea were fer real, wouldn't I know about that. If the art of healing hands (Reiki) were for real, or shiatsu and accupunture and accupressure were fer real...wouldn't I know that. I think so (1).

I guess click the Buteyko link if you wanna waste your time, or you can just trust and believe me (I have never ever lied in my life) that it is fakey fake. When reading the description in the Filipino newspaper my skeptic meter went off like a drunk Mel Gibson in a kosher supermarket-that means a lot. If this is not written down anywhere, it should be...everyone's skeptic meter should go off when there is any product that claims to cure a whole host of ailments-panacea. The article claims that if one practices this *special* breathing technique then one can cure anything from asthma to a limp dick.

I couldn't resist...I Googled "limp."

Other warning signs are stupido thingies like "the medical establishment doesn't want you to know about this," "proven technique that is centuries old," "it's natural." (2). If you hear or read these things and your skeptic meter is NOT going off, then you need to change the battery in your skeptic meter cause the shit isn't working.

This is the first style I learned. 1972 baby (it kinda sucks cause you end up spitting all over yourself).

So, is it possible that there could be benefits to using this technique...sure. We all need to breath, breathing is cool. In fact I do it everyday. The body needs oxygen and so does the brain. If one uses any breathing technique, esp. combined with what the New Agers call-mindfulness, then of course there will be benefits. One can use any meditation, yoga, Gojo Ryo Karate has cool breathing techniques, tai chi and chi gung are also really effective breathing techniques. The thingy about it is we already know how to breath, naturally. It is fakey fake for anyone to tell you (esp. if they are charging money) that they have cornered the market on breathing. If you just sit in a chair and concentrate on making deep breadths, as opposed to any of the techniques I mentioned, I do not see any difference, well except for your bank account (it will be smaller and...limp).

I'm not sayin' don't breath, I'm sayin' don't spend money learning something that we already do naturally. As those great philosophers from the late 80's said "Don't believe the hype (and don't spend money on it)."

(1) I'm not sayin' that after one of those treatments one will not feel good, what I'm saying is that there are real world, physical (physiological) happenings that make those things work. It's certainly not chi.

(2) Just because something is old and natural doesn't mean that it's correct. For example blood leeching is old, so there.

* Article in GMA News Philippines

Sliced Bread, Centaurs And Inspiration

2012-01-16T10:24:00.000-08:00

Admit it, this is the most epic shit you will see today. Right on Centaur Bro, right on.

In case you haven't gotten that memo that people keep talking about, nerds and geeks are the new sexy (believe me, I know...I'm one of them). The reason is because, what the LOL Cats call da erffs, is going to hell in a hand basket. We need smart and smarter people to lead us into the future. We need altruism, skepticism and yes, The Mighty (say it in a booming Gawd voice) TEAM ATHEISSSSSSTTTTTT.

For quite a while now there has been a scientific brain drain in the good ol' U. S. of A.. Those kookey Chinese and those super hot Indians (ladies, heellloooo) are whomping our redneck, bible thumpin' arses all over the periodic table, all over the theoretical, all over the...you get the picture, right. That is why this idea is made of awesome.

A very brilliant man by the name of Bill Willers is having an art show of sorts...in a museum. Sure usually science-y stuffs go into museums, but the sculptor and zoologist Mr. Willers is currently having a show called Mythological Wildlife. The intent is to show the young-ens the absurdity of mythical creatures like my man the Centaur pictured above, or the mythical creature that I always thought was cool, the Griffin.

Surprisingly Willers said that the children are the ones that say, "Hey man, that's not right." While it is the parents that he is worried about (he didn't say it, but it's the biblical parents he's worried about, really.) That kookey endeavor called cryptozoology is sumthin' that Willers wants the young-ens to learn about as well as...real science.

I think the hairy stinky dude is better...funnier.

This has got to be the coolest thing since sliced bread...inspiring the next generation of scientists in a growing world of stupidstition and unreasonable faith. I believe in the future, I believe that as humans we can make the world a better place for everyone-theist and nontheist. But we have to know what we know, that is where scinece and the scientific method come into play. The time for wishful thinking is over and done like the Denver Broncos football season (I guess Jesus hates you, or he hearts the other team better, Timmy) and THE WAY, at least as far as I'm concerned...is 1) science and two...just guess...no, I wuz gonna say 2) Team Atheist, baby.

Let's inspire those kids, folks.

* USA Today.

The Voice Of Gawd Is An Offstage Assistant

2012-01-14T12:05:00.000-08:00

OK, I'll try my best on this one. My mental capacity is up and down, just like my moods. No don't cry kind gentle and very good looking readers, I'm mostly on the up. It's just that....you know. Any who...

Apparently there is a charlatan in the UK by the name of Psychic Sally Morgan. I guess she can speak to the dead and all that shit (psychics can do anything, right) and her powers are so awesome that she got all butt hurt because people (skeptics, media) think that she's a fraud (imagine that).

"Thanks 'Gawd', that was a great show. Job well done, now let's go get a beer...Barry."

Was it a year ago, or a couple of years ago, when Simon Sing, member of Team Skeptic, got sued for libel (is that an English word. It means that someone is gonna sue you cause you talked "shit") because he said the correct (chiropractic medicine that deals w/subluxations is fakey fake). Unfortunately for The Si-Man, he had to go thru a shitty and long court process just to prove his "innocence". After hella time and money...he got off (and he never did anything wrong in the first place. So unfair). Which brings us to this...

Psycho Sally is going to go all "libel" on the UK press because they called her a fraud and a cheat...and stinky (OK, I made up that last one...maybe). Keep in mind, she can sue me also...after all I'm talking shit. That is why in the aftermath of the Sing case, there is much talk about reforming the libel laws across the pond.

If my understanding is correct, then if you talk shit about someone and they don't feel that it is correct (or they are shallow and vengeful)...then they can sue you. Am I missing something. Don't we have freedom of speech-n-stuffs (1).

Well Team Skeptic would be in for another long haul except this pic/video that has surfaced staring Psycho Sally. So these weirdos *claim* to be able to talk to your dead relatives, they charge money for it, they make a good living and...they are scamming good, honest people. If she were truly a psychic, someone that can see the future-n-stuffs, then she would have known that pictures and videos of her taking off an EARPIECE THAT TRANSMITS INFORMATION FROM ONE PERSON BACKSTAGE DIRECTLY INTO HER EAR would surface. Turns out the voice of a God, or sumthin', is really an assistent piping the information directly into her ear. So much for the *miraculous*. Maybe she was talking to Bruce Lee, I dunno....

Off the top of my head I cannot think of any of the other charlatans by name that have been caught doing this (Team atheist/skeptic nerd help me on this one) but even my Nor Cal stoner memory remembers that this has happened many times before. I'm sure JREF has lot's of that evidence.

I Googled "UK libel laws suck" and this came up. Whatevah.

This is about that free speech the skeptic, atheist, secular blogosphere keeps talking about. Really...really, these frauds can be all, err, fraudulent, sell their scammy wares and rip good honest people off, but if they get called out on it by Team Skeptic, then Team Skeptic gets sued (which costs hella time and money just to prove the obvious-innocence). Often times peeps ask, What's the harm. Let people have their illusions, err, beliefs." Well this is the harm.

Hope we nipped this one in the bud.

* Stephen Law UK philosopher dude covering the action.

* Prove your powers

* Pullin' out an earpiece. busted, yo.

(1) I know I'm being simple, but am I wrong.

Please No, Not...Hippster Christianity

2012-01-14T10:00:00.000-08:00

I'm not bragging when I say this...I've always been really popular (jock/student government/cool guy), super well liked and while I've never considered my self what is now called a hippster, fo sho I'm not mainstream, and I've always called it-alternative. So you can imagine why my smile is so totally huge right now (my smile is totally huge right now), upon discovering...Hippster Christianity. Oh, lord.

I've seen all kinds of bands, never Christian punk rock, tho.

Even I jumped on the Timmy Tebow bandwagon last week, I mean if God favors Timmy, then who am I to diss that, and I'm a frackin' atheist. Everytime dude proselytizes on national TV, in front of the whole nation...I cringe (where's the atheist exposure), he makes Christianity and external profession of faith in the public square, OK, cool in an "awh shucks" kinda way and err, cool.

Not to be left behind, that kid I wrote about last year because I had never heard of him and he was in the news all of the time, is making Beliebers outta many, not because he says "Jesus loves you" at the end of his shows, but because he is sporting that coolest of cool possessions for a hippster...a tattoo...a tattoo of "HIM".

Will someone tell dude that Jesus was probably...brown and not fair.

Pull up yer pants, yo.

I have reported on mixed martial arts Churches, gangster churches, WBC, LGBT churches, the minister that only drank beer for lent, but I don't recall reporting of the hippster churches. Apparently I smoke too much pot, because this article was written in 09'. Why didn't anyone tell me about this.

Not only is there the merging of punk and Christianity, they also have books about them: Hippster Christianity: When Church and Cool Collide. Here's a review.

Man, I really got a boner for this one. The rest of today will be dedicated to reading up on Hippster Christianity...and yes, I'm an atheist nerd.

Write mo' later.

"Yes sister and brothers...Jee-sus is the original revolution."

* Christian Punk Meets American Pop

* That kid I wrote about last year because I have never heard of him.

* Beliebers

Happy Friggatriskaidekaphobia

2012-01-13T08:52:00.000-08:00

I'm going to write about the controversy in women's tennis...next.

Well happy Friday the 13th everyone. I'll start off by sayin' I'm confused. I see three words to describe this unluckiest of unlucky days, let's see if I can get this one correct...Paraskevidekatriaphobia is a word coined by Dr. Donald Dossey to cure the irrational fear of Friday the 13th (saying the word cures this next word), friggatriskaidekaphobia. Then there is the word triskaidekaphobia and that is just the fear of the number 13, on any day I guess. Say all these words together three times and...and, nothing will happen except the satisfaction that you can say these words; or you can use my word for it-stupidstition.

That Judas...the 13th apostle.

Because of Juliann's awesome calendar that we have settled on (1) every 400 years follows a pattern. Within this pattern there are some years with 3 Friday the 13's and some with one, like this year (thanks Jullian, if that is your real name). Lending to the mystery of this particular Friday, outta the 7 days of the week, the 13th occurs most on, guess, Fridays (that way people that believe in stupidstition can connect the dots that require no connection). Couple o' thingies kind gentle and very good looking readers...

There is a Norse myth about 12 God dudes chillin' at a table when that mischievous Loki (Thor's brother, right) shows up. Not only was Loki not invited to the diner party, nor did he bring any chips or dip, or mandatory bottle of wine, he convinced another God, "Hoder, the blind god of darkness, to shoot Balder, the beautiful..." Then the erffs became dark, terrible suffering happened and that is why Friday 13th is dookie.

Another one is...In that Christian religion that we keep talking about 1) Cain killed, not Kenny his lesser known brother, but Able, 2) some believe that the hottie Eve tempted Adam on a Friday (after all, it is the end of the work week, have a beer or two...eat an apple and see what happens, wink wink) and 3) their 1/3 man, god, ghost was nailed to a piece of wood and died on Friday (which to the casual observer...doesn't seem all that powerful.). So it is no wonder that xtians are not into Friday's esp Friday the 13th. Oh wait...and Judas was the 13th apostle and he went all Wikki Leaks on the J-Man, don't forget that one.

Because of these three irrational tongue twister fears, millions and millions of dollars are lost in business each and every year. Some peeps are so weirded out by this date that they stay home, ya know, where it's safe. You guys know that means to me...I'm going to the bar, the lines will be short.

Awesome, don't die today peeps.

* Snopes Friday 13th

* Nat Geo Friday 13th and da, bible

(1). I propose, and I've said this before, we need to start a new calendar for Christopher "My hero" Hitchens passing. Just like B.C. we can have A.H.-after Hitch.

* You guys lucked out that for whatevah reason I can't post Youtube videos here anymore, cause I was thinking about post that *really good song*...Friday.

I Can Haz Phun

2012-01-12T17:29:00.000-08:00

I do not participate in pop culture. I don't watch TV* or go see movies-n-stuff, so I'm always late to the game. I have claimed to heart the LOL Cats, esp Atheist Cat; but I didn't know that Ceiling Cat had it's own page thingy...with a story to follow-n-stuff. Check it out.

If you don't like LOL Cats...I don't trust you (I can haz mai phun).

* When I DO watch Tv, seriously...just foreign films and PBS...I'm a hipster snob like that.

The Return Of Exorcisms...Again

2012-01-12T10:54:00.000-08:00

There is an attempt to return to...exorcisms. Yes, the future is now, well, except when religion is involved. It's the conservative Christian right that wants the return to that 1950's America that may or may not have existed (if your a baby boomer white person. It probably didn't exist for the masses), religion has held back the progress of the mind and the human condition for at least 2,000 years in exchange for clinging to the outdated, harmful and I'll just say it...it stupid.

Growing up a Filipino Catholic there was no way to question the existence of demons and Satan, much less God and as an adult card carrying member of Team Atheist, I see that childlike faith still has it's unreasonable and irrational tentacles wrapped around society. Really, a normal, rational adult is supposed to believe that Satan sends demons to inhabit ones body in the made up battle between heaven and hell. With all we know about brain chemistry and mental illness, there are still factions of society that want to take away personal responsibility and put it on the metaphorical shoulders of a freekin'....demon.

Father Jose Antonio Fortea is a real deal exorcist. He is studying to get his doctorate in theology in Rome and he travels countries lecturing about the many books he has written on the topic of exorcism. He claims that the bible is the best textbook for exorcisms, and that is because Jesus was an exorcist. He is also trying to expand the definition of the possessed to include more subtle demonic mischievous (and I think that is an attempt to drum up more business). He says, "Ever exorcism is a gift that helps us believe." I say, and quote me on this one, " Demons are fake, Satan is fake, exorcisms are fake, but brain chemistry and mental illness are as real as I'am sexy...and humble." Quote me on that one.

In an effort to eliminate the competition, he claims that exorcisms are necessary often times when people practice something called Santeria, which to me sounds like a delicious alcoholic drink one enjoys in the summertime with friends, as well as magic, witchcraft and that super evil and destructive demon, New Age philosophy. It's really quite ingenious of "them"...eliminate the competition. It's basic economics, folks.

"Oh wait, you're not a boy. I'm sorry miss. Tell your brother to come see me in the rectory. Sorry our inside joke."

Oh, pray tell (I'm not sure what that means)...I can go on and on. I'll end with this...

"Demonic spirits take over the body, not the soul, he said, which is why the sacrament of confession is more important for the average Catholic than exorcism (link)."

There are no such things as demons, only brain chemistry and I'd rather go to see a psychiatrist than go into some box and tell some boy fucker all the weird, cool and sinful things that I have done (I'd be scared they're wacking it in there and I was raised Catholic and I always went to confession and I always told the truth, like I do now. ie "Father forgive me for I have sinned, I have smoked the weeds, talked back to my parents and I felt a cute white girls booty....and I liked it. A lot...a lot. Forgive me father, I'am with sin. Yuckie). While the world is sending their best and brightest to the states for education in science and technology (for them to return to their countries), lazy, uneducated, uber religious, fat, stupid and blind Americans are believing in frackin' demons, when they should be getting real scientific medical attention.

Previously

Here also

Pull Out The Awesome Sauce File, Please

2012-01-12T09:12:00.000-08:00

Let's file this one under awesome sauce. Let's file this one under that's one for the good fight. Are things getting better or worse in this insane world that we live in...this time it's getting better. This young piece of super awesomeness named, Jessica Ahlquist, schooled her, err, school and the adults on the schoolboard in her district. At age 16 she obviously has a black belt in badd-ass-ed-ness. Yea buddy...

That document The New Atheist keep talking about..and secularists...and the ACLU...and ...

Here's the short of it...Her school violated that separation of church and state that the mighty atheist blogosphere keeps talking about by putting up a banner with a prayer on it (oopsie). Seemingly she was the only one that has read the constitution because she didn't get support from any of her peers or the so called adult leaders in her school. In fact...

Hey baby, we should live on this street. Just sayin'.

Someone identified as "person of faith" said, "...start every game with a prayer with the team...obligation to protect and defend moral values of our students with this banner (1)." OooooKaaaayyy, incriminate your self much. So stupid...sheez. Any who...

This is covered all over the blogoshpere so I'm not going to go into the people can have morals without God and First Amendment, we all know that (it's "them" that doesn't know that). What I wanna talk about is a lesson that I learned from a Buddhism that I used to practice years ago...pre Nu Kriss let's say.

Buddha rulez, assholes.

There was this great sayin' that we used to use all of the time and it goes like..."It takes one to stand for the rest to follow" and that is just what our teen-inspirer did. Oh...oh kind gentle and very goodlooking readers, as you know I really really really hearted me some Christopher Hitchens-my hero. when he recently passed I had super weirdo thoughts like, gee I dunno...now the New Atheists are gonna fail...we are going to fade away...WTF is gonna happen now.

I'm absolutely inspire by Ms. Ahlquist. This article says...

"This girl stood up to not just peers but politicians to fight for the values of separation of church and state. In doing so, she gave her friends a lesson in civic responsibility and gave her school board a lesson in constitutional values. At a time with separation principles under attack, Jessica added a case in the win column for a society where faith is a personal not a public priority (link)."

This is one for the good guys. This is one for those that want and believe in a religion free public square. This is one for the good guys.

Thanks Jess...(got any older sister or aunts around age 35-ish, I'm Kriss)...(maybe green eyes, OK).

(1) I'm going to go out on a limb and say "person of faith" is one of the coaches at the school...probably the football coach. Just sayin'..

* Friendly Atheist

My Beautiful Philippines

2012-01-11T10:09:00.000-08:00

I wuz gonna write about this real deal exorcist on the left, but I got horny for my beautiful Philippines. It is a gonna be in the 60 degree range today here in Sac Town, which I admit is very comfortable, but the Philippines is, like, 70-85 degrees all year around. Besides that, the water here doesn't look like that.

Yes, there are white people in the Philippines. Australia is south so there ya go. Totally honest of me, but I really dig seeing brown shinny Filipino children with smiles on their faces. I wish I could do something for them.

I recycled this one from the previous post, which you should read...right.

C'mon now...look at that housing. Totally ridicules in a great way.

When we went to an island, like, on the 'aother side' the South China Sea was on that side and where we were at the water looked darker. I dunno if this pic is from there or what, i just sayin'.

This is the pic I'm a gonna use in my exorcist post coming right up...next...I hope...we'll see. Le sigh.

It is my fantasy dream that #teambro, selected Sac Town friends, my bro and sis and theirs, my kind gentle and very good looking readers...and of course, my Tweeps, can one day sit on a beach like this and drink San Miguel beer for, like, 40 cents a pop. We'll chill on the beach and talk about how inexpensive it is while simultaneously the workers are talking about how they sold one beer to the Americans for 40 cents. It a win win.

One day....

* Google Philippines or beaches Philippines and be totally amazed...amazed.

My Wacky Filipino People Are At It Again

2012-01-11T09:36:00.000-08:00

In my beautiful Philippines my people believe that touching this burn piece of wood will *heal them*. I think you can also just be in the presence or general vicinity and that is why up to 8 million of my people go to check out the Traslacion (the Transfer) "of the lovingly venerated lifesize Back Nazarene image of our Lord Jesus from Intramuros (I've been there (1)) to Quiapo, Manila..." Or as I call it, moving a burnt Jesus cross across town.

Yea looks just like Him...doesn't it.

My peeps have those awesome Spanish rapers and pillagers, err, I mean those dudes that took our country by force and stole our land, no I mean the people that NOT graciously implanted their religion on my peeps and it spread like a virus the same way they did it here in the states with the Native Americans (Indians); that is by ill force. No what I mean to call them is Spanish Conquistadors...yea, that's what I meant. Any who...

I'm doing this from memory so all you Filipino history buffs out there (Troy) correct me if I'm wrong, but, it was in the 1600 when a lifesize wooden Jesus carrying the cross was being shipped to the islands from Spain. I'm assuming that they were drunk because the ship caught on fire and the statue got burnt black. When it arrived I guess they wanted to see the silver lining of it all and was all like "this is miraculous." It also survived a burnt down church or two.

One article I read said 3 million and another said up to 8 million of my devout flip-homies went to the procession which lasted fro, like, a whole day. The reason why there is the "Traslacion" in the first place is because the place it chills at has too many visitors and if they have their parade every year then millions upon millions of my ailing and in need of medical attention people can go check it out. This years festival required 1,000 police to not only do crowd control, but because those crazy Islamic Filipinos know that that is a good time to go all roadside bomb-n-stuff (that is what the Catholic Northern gov. said).

My people are so ga ga in their Catholic worshiping (recall we literally nail ourselves to crosses-crucifixion-every year for some reason) and even tho there are many religious festival thu-out the year, this one is the ONE. It is so popular that authorities are thinking of taking it on tour to different and more provinces. This years event was the biggest evah evah. I guess it could be a symbol of hope-n-shit so that is why it is so powerful...and the healing powers, don't forget the healing powers (there's no universal health care in the islands).

It's sort of funny that at religious events on the islands that after there is always hella litter.

Not funny thing about my people going to see the burnt piece of wood because it has *miraculous* healing powers is that 600 peeps were treated for exhaustion, there was a stampe, pulling, shoving, cuts-n-bruises and dozens were hospitalized for hypertension (WTF) and fractures because they got all crushed-n-shit in the massive crowds, in addition to terrorist threats. Makes me instantly think "God sure does work in mysterious ways."

The NOT best thingy about Mulatto Jesus is that he comes out for another festival during another part of the year. Yippie.

(1) Intramurous would be like if you live in Sacramento and went to Old Sacramento. In fact, now that I think about it, it would be like going to the historic "old town" of whatevah city you live in. It was the wall fort for the Spanish invades to protect them and their clergy from my peeps, ya know, cause they invaded and occupied us for hella long. When i went there I thought is was no big deal and kinda stinky because it's so humid there and there is mold everywhere. I liked going to the bookstores, but I didn't like the mold smell. I'm American, so there.

* Reuters

* Manila Times

This is what I think about when I think "Philippines"...the beach is nice also.

A Survey And My New Word...Denialism

2012-01-10T10:21:00.000-08:00

So y'all know me. As usual I was having my morning coffee (no breakfast beer today...at least not yet) just cruising through Lifeway Research: Biblical Solutions For Life (1) when I came across their new survey. I think this survey says a lot about the current state of belief v. science in this very important voting year. Check this out, yo.

1,000 American Protestant Pastors split about evenly on the question "Is da erffs 6,000 years old?" It's not kinda pathetic, it is totally pathetic. It is really hard for me to believe that a relatively normal U.S adult still falls for the bad ol' and childish church lie "Satan put all that fossil and geological evidence (like carbon dating) to tempt you and fool you, you mere human."Unfortunately because it was a 50/50 split that is the best statistic. It gets way worse.

Concerning the statement "I believe God used evolution to create people" a whopping (yes, I said whopping) 73% said no way bro-skie. What does that even mean.

That means that 73% of the leaders that totally influence 1,000's and 1,000's of people, week in and week out, are telling (not teaching) their peeps that God created humans fully intact that way we are right now today-no evolution required. Really Team Atheist, not to be, like, all superior and smarter than the average believer but...WTF. Besides that, if anyone thinks that these pastors are encouraging skepticism, critical thinking (and I'm sure that very few do...) and fact checking, then I think you are giving them too much credit.

Look at the current race to be the GOP representative that loses to the awesome Black Prez and how they totally poo poo evolution. Super crazy statements come from them like "evolution is just a theory" and "yes, I do believe that Intelligent Design should be taught right along side evolution." Where did they learn that...their churches.

I just thot this pic was funny...and true.

Here's my favorite one...74% agree, that is AGREE, with the statement "I believe Adam and Eve were literal people." Oh my garsh. If I were dead right now I would be turning in my grave. All the cool kid atheists know that this last year there has been that talk, you know-that talk-of how Adam and Eve are totally made up, mythical, they never existed and it would be impossible. (I'll make a logical fallacy right now...) Even conservative Christian scholars have admitted and agreed with the latest research that sends the idea of Adam and Eve to the folklore bookshelf.

Why? First of all, it is impossible for two people, that is two human beings with a finite amount of genes, to account for all the genetic diversity in the world today. I dunno who, but some brainiac calculated that with the amount of time that humans have been on da erffs (98,000 years I believe, correct me if I'm wrong Team Know It All) compared to all the genetic diversity in humans today that two love birds could not possibly have been the source for all of humanity today (the last year of our existence so sayith the interpreters of Mayan 2012).

Besides that...Did any of the believers in the churches of the pastors surveyed ever think to ask, "Hey wouldn't that mean there was a lot of that bad ol' brother sister fucking going on, and doesn't that make Gawd a total freak." Even though were are talking about 1,000's upon 1,000's of believers, I'm not going to give them enuff credit to come up with something as common sense as that (2).

Not only is this important because this is an election year, this is important because I love this country. I'm proud to be an atheist/skeptic Filipino-American. I do not heart it when America is losing in the arenas of science and technology. I do not like it when the rest of the world looks at America as a bunch of fat, blind and uneducated religious fanatics that show denialism when presented with the facts.

This is why the battle for secular society is so important (I haven't said that in a while). This is why The New Atheist must keep working of the foundation that the Four Horsemen provided. This is why we need to have unity, put down our differences, and become that team I keep talking about.

Team Atheist forevah...

(1) What you don't go to LWR. C'mon atheists. Y'all gotta check out Pew Research, Tempelton Foundation and Answers in Genesis to name a few. After all to know them is to debate them (and win).

(2) Slowly, very slowly...I'm becoming and unapologetic angry atheist and I'm not going to say sorry. Nu Kriss, baby.

* Article

Kriss Sighting In The City

2012-01-09T10:00:00.000-08:00

Well, I did it. I went to a concert and I didn't freak out. Yippie. I was really scared to go because the last show I went to in the beginning of June was dookie (thanks depression), but I guess that is behind me (thanks meds) and the forever kid is back (I think I'm ready for fulltime gallivanting now).

The English Beat wuz one of my favorite of favorite bands in the 80's and they totally killed it with their set. In fact, if I had seen this set in the 80's I'd be totally happy. They played I Confess, Save it for later, Mirror in the bathroom, Click click (which to me was the highlight), Twist and crawl, Tenderness, I'll take you there, Rough rider (she's a cool stroker), Doors of my heart, (did they play) End of the party, Can't get used to losing you, Rankin full stop, Stand down Margaret and, if I forgot any, forgive me (I smoked two joints to my head, my bro don't go Rasta).

Super funny, funny thing. We rolled up to the venue, Bimbos, and upon entering I said to myself, "Dam, it looks like my English teacher is here." What I meant by that, is that everyone looked...old. Really, when I go out here in Sac Town I'm totally surrounded by 25 y/o's. It was such a trip to party with peeps...dare I say, my age.

The 40 something dudes looked horrible and their ladies looked hot. For pretty much ever song everyone knew all the words and really, I haven't heard these songs since the 80's so it was really special for me (that's bro). It got hot and sweaty on the dance floor and once again...those cougars were hot (there is deff a lack of hot cougars (my age) here is Sac Town).

Well, I got a good one under my belt and it felt good to be back. A couple posts ago I wrote something to the extent "where is Kriss, I have been looking for him." I think I saw a glimpse of Saturday nite.

Awesome sauce.

This is my Playlist.com English Beat selection. Not too much there and if ya wanna follow me and my playists (it's free), well guess...krissthesexyatheist. http://pl.st/p/22904604427

Last FM. Beat videos and songs.

* OK next post...destroy religion. I promise.

I'm On The Bandwagon

2012-01-09T08:49:00.000-08:00

I watched my first football game of the season yesterday, and I was toooootallllllllyyyyyy stoked. Guess who I watched...Lil Timmy Tebow.

OK atheist bare with me. Fo sho I do not like his outward and external, expression of his faith. If he came into my work and slapped my ass after making his mocha and said "Praise the Lord, Kriss. He enabled you to make this delicious mocha for me," I'd say, "Shut the fuck up, asshole." I'm just talking football right now.

The game was really good, tight, close score and even went into overtime. Team Jesus was the underdog and it looked like, fer freekin' sure, that the powerhouse Steelers were going to win...then "He" appeared. If you don't know all season the Broncos (Team Jesus) have played horribly until the four quarter then, as many a TV announcer has said, "divine intervention" happens. This game was no different.

Team Jesus got the ball first and first team to score wins in overtime. Team Jesus had been running the option for most of the game...so what are they going to do in the beginning of overtime...gee I dunno, I guess just run the fake-option-play-action pass because the Steelers were playing tight and 8 or nine men in the box, three step drop to a receiver that ran an arrow-post route for a freekin' 80 touchdown on the very first play of overtime....for the win.

That was pure football epic. The underdogs won, the critics were proven wrong and the best part...I got to see Lil Timmy...Tebowing.

* Here's some fakey fake numerology. Timmy used to wear john 3:16 on his super macho footbally eyeliner when he played at Florida State. Guess what...he threw for 316 yards on Sunday and had done 316 interviews up till that point. I guess it's true, that Mathew 5:5 Blessed are the meek, for they will all inherent the earth."

* Don't revoke my atheist card. I'm gonna do a post on the concert I went to this weekend, then back to that atheist blogosphere grind that I heart so much.

* Good funny article at RNS. Even The Friendly Atheist chimed in. Awesome.

* the legend of Timmy is just too awesome. this is from the mighty Slate....

By playing nine and even 10 men in the box, Pittsburgh ensured that any play-action pass that Tebow completed would go for huge yardage. Tebow was just 10 for 21 on Sunday, but five of those 10 completions went for at least 30 yards. One of those came on the first (and last) play of overtime, when the Broncos cleverly faked a first-down run, leaving Demaryius Thomas in man coverage without a safety over the top. Tebow found Thomas across the middle, and—after a great stiff arm at mid-field—the Broncos receiver ran down the sideline for an 80-yard touchdown. Why did the Broncos win? Because the Steelers held Tim Tebow in such low esteem that they didn't believe he could complete a simple crossing pattern.

That' what I said.

Old Punk Rockers Never Die

2012-01-07T10:43:00.000-08:00

Old punk rockers never die...they either sell out and become mainstream or, as in my case, just get older. I'm 43 years old and I'm about to hop the train for one of those good old school road trips. Why is it old school...because it is.

I remember me and the original #teambro (1), the Rastifarian Youth Organization (RYO) taking the bus from Santa Rosa to San Francisco (The Golden Gate transit) for $2.50 each way. I dunno know how many times and how many shows and for how many years, but it was the standard road trip: enuff money to get into the venue and for beer and weed and that is it. Food was not an option. The difference for this particular trip, now in 2012, is that I don't have any weed (dammmmmm).

Years ago I made a promise to myself that when evah go to see a show that is outta town I'm going to 1) have plenty of money to spend on food, beer and weed and 2) have enuff money to get a hotel and be comfortable so we don't drive home (2hrs) drunk; or if we are together at the time, "runk". At that time my thought was "I'm too old to not do these things." I guess I'm not.

One time in the late 80's, and it might have even been in the super early 90's, I went to the City to see Echo and the Bunnymen. It was awesome. They played Lips Like Sugar and that 'moon' song (I forgot what it is called). My friend that I was going to meet there flaked so I was by myself, well, except for the 5,000 of my closest fellow black eyeliner, black turtle neck, pegged pants, thrift store oversized sport coat wearing, skinny black tie friends.

I gave my extra ticket to a girl in a group of girls that lived in the City. We danced that hi-energy dancing style, the kind that is in the video The Reflex by Duran Duran and that Bruce Springsteen song (I forgot that one also), and I recall that I was pleasantly happy because my eyeliner didn't smear and I made out with that teenage 80's hottie (we exchanged addresses later and if I recall correctly, I wrote her a love letter or two.).

After the show was over I headed to the bus station, but dagnabit, the next bus didn't leave until hours and hours later the next morning. In fact it was closed until the next bus left (WTF). So I wandered the streets of San Francisco to kill time. I was only 19-ish so I couldn't go to a bar, and if I could, I was too scared to try (that Chris was shy and timid, not like Kriss right now). I was brave enuff to try and buy some beer at small-ish liquor stores, but the hardened and street smart proprietors all knew a fresh faced 19 y/o when they saw one...denied. I went to the good 'ol punk rock standard back up plan and asked bums to get me some beer, but I was scared of them and there was only one of me (again, old Chris was timid and shy)...denied.

There was a 24 hour Jack in the Box on Market St. so I went there. I was trying to not look at the clock because I knew that I had hours and hours to kill so I just stared out the big window and watched the nite-time traffic roll by. While I was sitting there a super hot and slutty looking Asian women came in and strolled past me and it was so slow I was like "WTF." She looked at me the way an experienced woman looks at a fresh faced 19 y/o as if saying "mmm, fresh meat." I was all, like WTF and a little weirded out. What could a beautiful woman like this want from lil old me.

Her promenade continued and she walked the length of the Jack in the Box passing me two times. We were the only ones in there, I guess the employees we in the back or something, until a well and over dressed black man came in. He strolled by me also and he also gave me the look of "fresh meat" but it wasn't inviting like hers. He seemed pissed or mad or something and went up to the Asian hottie and said, "Fuck this, this is bullshit, bitch. Theyz ain't no money in here." Without saying anything else, they both left together.

That is the nite I slept in the bathroom of a Jack in the Box sitting on the toilet and that is one of the reasons why, years ago, I decided to travel in comfort, ya know, with plans and money. Like I said earlier...I'm still punk rock. I still go to shows with little money or plans. The difference this time...I'm gonna sleep at my brothers pad.

Wish me luck.

(1) We have always had the team concept with me and my friends. In the 80's we called ourselves the Rastifarian Youth Organization (we were not Rastas, we just smoked a lot of pot). Later we called ourselves The Revolution, later Team Blarp and inbetween probably many other names. currently...we are #teambro.

The Roundy Roundup For This Friday (That's today, Yo)

2012-01-06T11:31:00.000-08:00

Wow...so many good articles today and I can't settle on what topic to write about so guess what all you kind gentle and very good looking readers...no not chicken butt (this time)...time for a new roundup-n-shit.

Washington Post On Faith is killin' today. If they could bust out like this all of the time, then they would be my favorite (sorry RNS). One of the cool thingies about WPOF is that they give us a platform to do our thing. Par example...

Hey look, I'm Sammy Hagar's brother. OK, I'm not.

Psychologist and dude with really great hair, Steveo Pinker goes over the religion poisons everything spiel. His article Has religion made the world less safe is really not anything new to peeps that have participated in the conversation since the arrival of the 4 Horse Guys. But still, it's good to go over things and solidify you/our argument(s).

Believers and nonbelievers are cats and dogs, Mars and Venus, but sometimes, that is sometimes...chocolate and peanut butter is pretty OK. Rev. Barry Lynn of that secular group that is always in the news because they do really awesome work calls out Pat Robertson and his claim that god told him who will become the next president. It's very interesting to me because there were three GOP'ers that claimed that God told them to run for president and they are no longer in the race. Did God make an oopsie.

I Googled Pat Robertson squeezing out a poo.

Matisyahu, the hasidic reggae rapper, did the no no and...da da daaaa, cut his hair (their God said, bro don't do that.). I've seen his show twice. the first time it was awesome reggae dancing, super funky and the second it was all "spiritual" goobely-goo. I would be interested in seeing him again. hopefully it will be better than the last time (boring...snore).

The tiny president with the super hottie wife (where's my super hottie wife, le sigh) Nicky Sarkozy gives props to the ladies by visiting the grave of Joan of Arc. If she were still alive today she would be 600 and I'll just say it...all the cool guys like powerful women (f*ck submissive women, who the hell wants that) sooooo, I'd probably f*ck her. Any who..

Lastly, the religion of my peeps (Filipinos, because Spain cam to the islands and forced that shit down our throats...we probably were like Native americans of North american before they came and Islam was all up in the islands before Catholicism was.) has been in the news a lot this week and if you are a yound boy...that is not good.

I used to heart these as a kid.

First a Catholic bishop in LA resigned because he fathered some kids when he was supposed to be celibate and now they are adults. the church is going to compensate them by paying for college and counseling. This situation brings up celibacy and priesthood, but i could frackin' care less about that. what I'm surprised about and wondering...he did it with and...woman. That's not M.O..

It is the 10 year anniversary of the exposing of the Boston boy fucking scandal. Recall this was the first one, the one that blew it open. The Archbishop, then and now, has...get this...sorrow.

Then lastly, lastly...Pope stupid hat (really, bro, get some better gear, yo) recently appointed 22 new cardinals. That is pretty high up the boy fucking ladder and they get to vote for the next pope. Unfortunately, the one bishop that was vocal and critical about how the Catholic church handled the boy fucking scandal...was not promoted.

I got all these articles from the super awesome Washington Post On Faith. Pretty good stuffs for a one stop shop. Awesome atheist, there are so many to go to, there is religion News Service, CNN Belief Blog (the weakest of the bunch), Huff Po Religion and Religion Dispatches (super essay good) and many more. Atheist, get into the conversation and participate. I'll just say it...we are smarter than them and we are on the correct side of history. This IS the golden Age of Atheism. Let's do this together, like a team.

Awesome sauce peeps. I dunno if I'll be able to post this weekend. I'm going to the City where I wuz born and my awesome lil' brother is gonna take me to a show (I'm really nervous cause the last time I went to a show it was horrible. Thanks depression). I also hope to see my super sweetheart, old Deadhead friend that has fantastic hair. I might be looking for a new job and a place to live while I'm there and ya know what, if I can watch some football and drink some beer, then...baddass for me. Me me me....

Stay warm and awesome all you super smart, very good looking and godless reader peeps. wish me luck....

Mo' Kitten Covers

2012-01-05T18:02:00.000-08:00

Go to this site and follow it if you are on Tumblr. You can also follow me on Tumblr at, guess....krissthesexyatheist. Dugh. Enjoy.

We will Meow you...meow you. We willllllll, we willlllll, meow you.

It's Two minutes to meow nite.

This is the last Metallica album I was into.

I meowed a man in Texas...just to annoy him til' he died.

i can haz flying piggies.

A Cat man, can never be an African.

There is a Cleo in there.

Watcha, watcha watcha wan a nt...

Skinny ties and all.

Goodbye Crazy Eyes, Hello Rick

2012-01-05T09:28:00.000-08:00

My name is Rick, if I become president...so does my God.

I'm a total jerk face lately, so frackin' what. I think that when Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann announced the quitting of her campaign (which is pretty much spitting in gods face...right) she should have knocked the podium over while saying, "...and you Godless liberals won't have Michele Bachmann to kick around anymore." That would have been epic. Instead she took that high road that peeps keep talking about.

Don't trip fellow heathens. There is a new game in town and it goes by Rick Santorum. Let's take a quick looksie at Rick...

Don't get excited...it's a mask.

Dude believes that Intelligent Design should be taught right along side, ya know, evolution.

He believes that Europe has already lost the war against...ISLAM, because they are secular and that is why we absolutely need to allow his God (Catholic, but he appeals to Evangelicals also) to be all up in ever sector of society (and that is that dominionism that I keep talking about), because us secularists are too stupid to know that Sharia law IS in American society right now.

Rick believes Planned Parenthood should be defunded and in no case whatsoevah so abortion be allowed.

And lastly...he hates those super clean well dressed, and I'll hetero-admit, the very cute...teh Gay.

So if you saddened by Crazy Eyes not showing the glory and power of her specific God, by quitting (Sarah Palin thinks she's a quitter), fret not fellow Godless...There is a new can to kick and his name is Rick.

I never thot she was attractive.

* Here's a real article, ya know with facts and stuff like that. Thanks Religion Dispatches.

* Here's a money quote from RD's super good writer Sarah Posner. I like Religion Dispatches, just like I like Religion News Service because they both have the ladies writing for them. You go grrrls...

"Santorum peddles in paranoias that secularism (and, here, rights relating to sex and gender) will lead to a decline in Christianity, which will lead to a decline in fertility, which will open America to a takeover by Islamists. In his mind, it's all tied together, and it all has to do with religion."

Hey Atheists, Let's Party

2012-01-04T08:51:00.000-08:00

Wow...the National Atheist Party...that has a cool ring to it. When I first started this crazy no pay, lot's of hours, did I say no pay...atheist blogging (2y/rs ago) I used to talk a lot about "a place at the political table," and secular society stuffs. And honestly, as of late I've made this place less about information and more about me me me (so there). Any who, we still don't have that place at that table I used to talk about all of the time. Or do we...

Troy "I must be a really cool dude" Boyle is the co founder of The National Atheist Party ( NAP). He got the idea when he was watching Richard "Papa Bear" Dawkins. Papa Bear questioned why, why on gods green earth (he didn't say that, I did), why is there NOT an organized political atheist party. Boyle stepped up to the plate.

What does NAP stand for. Ya know just that no government sponsored religion, or non religion, that secularists keep talking about. You see, kind gentle and very good looking readers, there is a war going on. Dominionism is real (even tho they claim it is not) and dagnabit federal money IS going to religious institutions and one must have religion to run for office (even tho the rules say otherwise). There are believers out there that want to rewrite history to say that the Founding Fathers absolutely do want the bible taught in public schools and that there is no law above Gods law (that's you constitution).

So awesome sauce to this Boyle dude for getting the ball rolling. Just like anything new, the numbers are small right now, but that is OK. Our numbers were small before The Four Horsemen and the New Atheist popped onto the scene and look at us now (is it true that this year has been dubbed The Year of the Atheist). It takes one to stand for the rest to follow and that is what we should do peeps.

You can start by liking them on Facebook.

* Article RNS.

* Next we need to develop Andy's idea of a gang sign.

Roundup Jan 3, 2012

2012-01-03T11:46:00.000-08:00

This is tooooooo funny to me. There was an epic battle (fight) in the "birthplace of Christ" between monks and priests. You see, the rule is and I'm not kidding on this one, if you clean that part of the church...then it belongs to your splinter cell of whatevah. First of all Jesus wasn't born in Bethlehem (right), so that means they are squabbling over a lie in a pseudo historical place. In fact Israel/Palestine thinks fighting over a chunk of church is petty. Sheez. Lastly, if all you have to do is clean a part of the church and then it belong to you, then I propose the Shaolin Monks go over there and take the shit over.

This one is a heartbreaker and the headline says it all...Infidel Santa killed in Tajikistan. The Russian counter part is called Father Frost. Reports say that as Father Frost was being stabbed to death, yea super gross, people were yelling "infidel." Super yuck.

This one happened a couple of days ago...Some dude named Cee Lo Green hijacked our song, Imagine. Brainiac turned "and no religion too," to "and all religion is ture." WTF. That has got to be the stupidest thing in the world. First of all religion, if that is your real name, stop hijacking shit. You are not morally superior, you do not own the institution of marriage and you are not the only ones that can have a transcendental, or dare I say, spiritual, experience.

This is also one of the things where we can critique religion with common sense (no Phd. required). If all religions are true, then why are there so many religions. I guess God isn't so powerful as to create one true religion, whatevah that is. All religions preach love, but they have different vehicles to get you there and if you choose the wrong one...then you go to hell. So how can one religion be true. It cannot.

So to get back at them I propose that we change Jesus Christ Superstar to Jesus Kriss Rock Star. That'll make it even.

I dunno, I thot this was a totally funny picture.

OK, I took a couple of days off so lemmie see if I got this right...The extremist Jews that called 8y/o girls immodest and spit on them and make them NOT use the sidewalk in front of their Temple are protesting the more liberal, democratic government by wearing holocaust uniforms/costumes. Is that how this one is going down. OK then...

The extremist Jews have the right to segregate the women folk, even tho the rest of Israel society doesn't trip on that, they have the right to make their ladies sit in the back of the bus and the clothing police is also out there to make sure everyone (the ladies) are dressed modestly...but the government is all Nazi...am I reading this wrong.

Russia no like Western ways.

And lastly...I woudla published this roundup earlier but I was doing research. Apparently religious folk, whether they are one of the million Christian, Islamic or Jewish splinter cells, all like the good 'ol double ended two fer one dildo (right). The mulitbillion dollar sex toy industry just got holy'er, or Kosher, and, well...gross. This is a great example of cherry picking from religious texts (Qu'ran, bible) to sell your cause.

I grew up Catholic so sex is a no no. But then again I have never heard "If a man is unable to please a woman in bed, she can divorce him." Click the links within the links, it quite enlightening, err, biblical-n-shit.

Still there are those uppity old school religious people that slam their fists on the table and proclaim "SEX is for the glory of God (OK, weird much)." For the cool, married and normal person, other than they are believers, the can go to shop like Hooking Up Holy, Intimacy of Eden, Covenant Spice. So I know what you are about to ask, kind gentle and very good looking readers...what makes a dildo kosher...

The ingredients I guess, fuck...I dunno.

(Unfortunately) Extremist Make The World Go Around

2011-12-30T11:35:00.000-08:00

I have never seen an "immodest" 8y/o girl. I have seen many a 8y/o in my day, but never one that was "slutty." I just think that it is impossible. Then again I'm not Jewish. Then again I'm not the splinter cell within Judaism (I know that they are not a splinter cell, that is just what I say when I wanna insult peeps) know as ultra-Orthodox Haredi Jewish dudes. Here's a nutshell in case you don't know what's going on...

The reggae, hip hop Jewish awesomeness, Matisyahu, just cut his hair, which is against the "rules."

...a second grade girl got the worlds attention because these extreme Jews hate her. Why, because she is "immodest" Why? She was wearing a long sleeve shirt and a 3/4'rs skirt and she was walking on the same sidewalk as the men folk (which is a no no, to them). In fact, the women folk have to enter the temple thru a side door and worship in a diff area, they have to sit in the back of the bus (yes, this IS 2011). Not only is this one girl treated like this, it is the whole school of girls. There is a 'space' problem in Jew-ville and the extremists are pissed because there is a girls school in their neighborhood-n-shit.

Gross, look how "immodest" she is. Where are her parents.

This splinter cell of Judaism is very strict about their dress and beliefs (obviously, right. dugh) and their hair. They have a special place in society where their job is to study the Torah...and that is it (wouldn't that be awesome if your job was to study atheism and then you could control/command people. Well except that last part). err, awesome. Anywho....

It's 2011 and in a blink, it will be 2012. What do we have here? Do we have religion paving the positive way for society and making everything awesome for everyone.Are we advancing thot, philosophy and humanity, or....is this an example of religion holding peeps and the world that peeps live in, back, as in NOT forward, as in not getting better and perhaps getting worse. I can only speak for myself, but I believe that Team Atheist wouldn't mind religion if it were a source of ONLY good. As it is right now, it is a source of good and bad (and if you are religious and you can't admit that, then get outta here, U-not honest, loser).

I Googled "religion unites people" and this came up.

Why would I wanna belong to a club that thinks it's OK to throw rocks at little girls going to school (there is a video, but I couldn't find it) and spit on them (if someone spit on me, I'd kick their arse). If I'm a dude and I get on a bus I have the right to tell, not ask, some old lady to go and sit in the back. I don't know if she is sick, ill, just got off of work or what, but then studly me, I can demand "git in the back, beeotch." I could go on and on and on and on...

It is my hope that in the next year humanity unites and steps up to that plate that all the cool kids keep talking about and makes the world a better place. Is it getting better or is the world getting worse? When I hear stories like this, well, you know what I think; but I still have hope, I still believe in humanity.

This is why the battle for secular society is so important. It means equality for all. It means that divisive religion, whatevah religion it is, will have not place in the public arena.

* Article in Slate.

I Googled "Jewish cat" fer these gems. Just like their ladies...Jewsih cats are so cute.

The Sense Of Science

2011-12-29T17:58:00.000-08:00

Take er' easy big fella, take er' easy.

Wow, I'am really avoiding my next installment of (say it in an all knowing, deep and mysterious God voice) A WHOLE WEEK OF THE YEAR IN REVIEW....n-shit. Instead, let's git out science on.

I like my vitamins drip fed to me (even tho there is no proof it is better or whatevah).

I do believe that I wrote about the super awesome group called Sense About Science (SAS) last year at this time. Just like the Darwin Awards, SAS shows the stupid that humans do and in this case, the stupid concerning celebrities, science and stupid celebrity endorsement science. Without looking at last years post, just off the top of my head-n-shit, I would bet Annie's last bottom dollar that Jenny McCarthey and her autism research was one of the big winners. But what about this year...

For whatevah reason (money and gullible people) cleaning the inside of your booty was a huge money maker and people all around the country wuz doing the cleanse. Typical of pseudoscience there is a little tiny grain of truth to the effectiveness of colon cleansing( for specific purposes). But if you hear a claim that something is a panacea, that is something that can cure a wide variety of stuffs, then your skeptic meter should be going off. How or why does the butt douche prevent, let's say, sore throats. It doesn't, but that won't stop that money grubbing industry from selling that to you.

Presidential candidate, Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann said the science stupid this year when she claimed that she knew someone whoz daughter became "mentally retarded" after receiving the HPV vaccine. Will someone please tell the lawyer, she is a lawyer isn't she, Bachmann that correlation is not necessarily causation. Perhaps the woman's daughter stepped on a crack or walked under a ladder or something.

I do not have a TV but apparently there is a TV personality named Polizzi. This brainiac made the stupid statement that s/he doesn't like going to the beach because the ocean water is salty because it is full of whale sperm. I'm not even going to touch that one (rim shot, then laughter).

In another example of correlation is not always causation...A French footwear designer (is that a job?) made the claim that hi-heels are designed that way because that is the shape of a woman's foot when she has an orgasm. The belief is that if one puts their feet in that position they are literally putting themselves in position to have an orgasm. If it were only that easy, le sigh.

Gross, I Googled "hi heels orgasm" and a bunch of porn came up. Seriously, I'm anti porn.

Here in what is usually super awesome Sacramento we named our one and only big time sports arena after the creepy and fraud-y Power Balance Bracelet. Worn by many prominent athletes (Shaq, Beckham) the silicone hologram bracelet is supposed to increase energy, endurance, increase balance and totally give you an advantage over the loser that doesn't have one. Fo sho it could be one of those things, what do the cool people call it-self fullfilling prophecy, where you anticipate doing better and you have the confidence (even tho it is false) to do better, and guess what, you do better. but as far as instantly making one into super jock...probably not.

And lastly...a word from our sponsors.

"From fashion to fad-diets, medicine to super foods, and the environment to allergies, at Sense About Science we continue to monitor the science claims made each year by the influential and the famous. Scientists and members of the public send us the claims they have seen – about products, lifestyle choices and campaigns – that appear to make little scientific sense. We ask scientists to respond so that we can help celebrities realise where they were going wrong and encourage public discussion about sound science."

I just like this picture.

* Guardian UK

* The super bad thingy about the bad 'ol celebrity endorsements is that it might take years to reverse all the bad cancer advice, all the bad back problem advice and all the bad and incorrect advice...period. Most people can name hella celebrities, but the average peep not on Team Atheist or Team Skeptic cannot name a scientist much less know pseudoscience if it hit 'em in the head with a recently calibrated e-meter stolen from Tom Cruise's closet (what the hell did I just say).

Must Seek Out More Film Experiences

2011-12-29T09:17:00.000-08:00

In the late 80's and early 90's I really really really hearted David Lynch. I kinda lost touch, not just with him, but with film in general. I just don't go to see film anymore. Oh wellz, that's what new years resolutions are for. This vid is encouraging....

<iframe src="http://player.vimeo.com/video/33993633?title=0&byline=0&portrait=0" width="400" height="200" frameborder="0" webkitAllowFullScreen mozallowfullscreen allowFullScreen></iframe><p><a href="http://vimeo.com/33993633">David Lynch in Four Movements - A Tribute</a> from <a href="http://vimeo.com/user9586365">Richard Vezina</a> on <a href="http://vimeo.com">Vimeo</a>.</p>

Really, I don't know why I stopped. I think cinema is fantastic. It encompasses all the arts at the same time. Keep in mind I'm not talking about going to the movies, that's bullshit. I'm talking about film.

Tim v. Bill

2011-12-29T08:08:00.000-08:00

This is good coffee or sumthin'...I'm a gonna do another quick hitter post. So anyways, Bill Maher tweeted the other day "Wow, Jesus just f###d #TimTebow bad! And on Xmas Eve! Somewhere in hell Satan is tebowing, saying to Hitler "Hey, Buffalo's killin' them". Then the outrage happened. OK, errr, not his best joke, but it was a joke, ya know being that Bill is a comedian and all.

In Timmy's mind while this picture is being taken, "Thank you Lord, thank you."

You might not like the joke, but dude has the right to tell the joke. You don't have to laugh. You can change the channel or whateverah, even tho it's twitter. If people are a gonna be outraged over this, then they have to be outraged everytime that they say shit like, gee I dunno, "I'm/we are going to hell and we will suffer forever, unless of course you subscribe to what we believe."

(Or...lemmie get another one) Believe what we believe or my saviors dad will kill you, but somehow you will still suffer....forever, while we chill in a totally nice place.

(Or) You have sinned, you have always sinned and you must repent, but there is only one way to do that...I don't care if you were just born. Sinner.

(Or) I have a plan for everything, but you can pray to me (God) because I answer all prayers, but it still goes according to my amazing and infallible plan, you see, human, you are to stupid to understand my mysterious ways (so mysterious it seems that there is no plan, but I thought of that-human)..is that confusing...then pray.

I think that is way more harmful than Bills joke. At least it's a joke. when you say that...you're fer real.

* Funny thing. I kinda like Timmy. After all he does help poor peeps in my beautiful Philippines, and I certainly cannot hate a guy for that.

Awwwww, The Baby Rhinos

2011-12-29T07:36:00.000-08:00

Is this touching or am I going crazy...don't answer that.

I'm having my first cup o' coffee, opened the first newspaper, went to the first article and it's...touching. 35 probably stinky (1). Are things getting better or worse or both simult. I just thought it was nice...there's baby rhinos also.

All babies are cute...even stinky baby rhinos.

(1) Parts of the jungle are really stinky. I totally bet that rhinos are Stank-os also.

Hello 80's

2011-12-28T17:59:00.000-08:00

I know I promised a whole week of (say it in a huge God voice) THE YEAR IN REVIEW, but quite frankly, I'm in a good mood right now and I wuz agonna write about me becoming an full fledged angry atheist, which would be a switch from what I call the accomodationalist atheist...but let's talk about music instead.

My super awesome lil brother (that is huger than I) invited me to go see The English Beat at Bimbos (SF) not this weekend, but next weekend. I haven't enjoyed that music that the cool kids keep talking about, mmm, about all year and I actually have positive feelings about this. I would say, I'm semi-stoked right now.

First of all, I have never been to Bimbos. If it is like any of the other places in The City, then it will have brass molding, murals and an oldsie retro feel. My fav place is the historic Filmore and then, I guess, Great American Music Hall. Lot's of the old places that I used to check out, The Keystone and Mabuhay Gardens, are not even around. Just like all those oldsie retro movie theaters, that used to be scattered about in all the nieghborhoods, the music venues of my 80's experience, The Keystone and Mabuhay Gardens, are all a thing of the past. One of the reasons I'm semi-stoke about this show is that I have never been to Bimbos. Awesome sauce.

Another reason I'm semi-stoked is because The English Beat was one of my favs from the 80's (that I keep talking about). As I go down the list of my favorite bands from the decade of my teens, I have pretty much seen every and all the bands that I really hearted back then. I've seen R.E.M., U2 (3X's), The Red Hot Chili Peppers (before they got super huge), The Cure, The Smiths, Oingo Boingo, Simple Minds and Depeche Mode to name a few (and that is not to include all the punk bands and smaller type shows). Off the top of my head I would say that I would have liked to see The Clash or The Police, but other than that...I think I got them all.

I don't know why I never went to see The English Beat. After punk, and with a little bit of overlap, ska was one of my favorite 80's styles of music. If ya don't know, ska is reggae on meth and steroids. It is the definition of upbeat. Bands like The Specials, Selector, as well as TEB, were part of a movement called Two Tone. It had it's own fashion. For example, I would wear dark slacks with pegged legs, penny loafers or...or, dam I forgot what those shoes are called, anywho...skinny black tie, white collared shirt, plaid small hat (I forgot what that is called also), trench coat if necessary, black turtle necks and my prized possession...my prescription Ray Ban Wayferer tinted glasses. Man wish I had pictures of mod Chris (I was Chris back then not Kriss)...oh yea, and my bi-level hair cut and black eyeliner. I totally bought into that culture.

As a minority growing up in the country surrounded by rednecks it was difficult to find my people. there were Filipino people in Santa Rosa but it wasn't like I hung around them (obviously from an early age I was alternative, deff. not mainstream. Thanks marijuana). Going to shows, wheter it was punk, New Wave or ska, was like going home to my people. I didn't feel comfortable at home, at school I was accepted because I was also a jock and popular and in student body-but I didn't feel at home there, and it wasn't like I was chillin' with my jock friends after practice-n-stuff. To put on that uniform whatever it was that year, at that time and to go to this entirely different world, many times in San Francisco, where people looked like me, we danced to music we loved and we sang the songs because we memorized the lyrics...it meant so much to me.

I have seen the "offshoots" of the English Beat in the late 80's and early 90's. General Public was the best, but it didn't satisfy me because I wanted to hear some Beat songs" mirror in the bathroom, click click, I confess. One time we went to the really awesome Greek Theater in Berkeley and saw this hybrid band of different ska bands (Boingo, Beat, Selector...whoeveah) but it was horrible. horrible I tell ya. I remember we were so disappointed and the drive back to Santa Rosa was shit.

The Fine Young Cannibals were pretty good...in fact I saw them at the Greek Theater and they opened up for UB40, who always had an upbeat band open for them (another time I saw UB40 Midnight Oil opened up-epic)...but in my heart I knew that I wanted the full ska experience of The English Beat. By this time I had already seen fishbone a million times and they started going into their rock phase anyways and also by this time, Oingo Boingo had broken up. I wanted some Beat.

So this is a cool thingy, ya know, being all semi-stoked to see a show, when I haven't seen a show in a while and it's a band that I always hearted but never saw. fo sho I will write a review, just like I always do and...and...well, wish me luck cause it's a oong cold Winter and the City is full of that Hearting I keep talking about.

Awesome.

* OK now I remember...wing tips. Those are the shoes.

* I'm scared I'm going to injure myself because the music is so upbeat. Perhaps I should try some more cardio before the event.

I Found Jesus, He's In Japan

2011-12-27T09:45:00.000-08:00

This is too awesome. Jesus is buried in Japan. Really. Shingo Aomori Prefecture, home of aprox 3,000, is where Jesus is buried. Ya know how I asked the other day what about those missing years of dudes life in the bible-n-shit. Well, this video claims that those missing teenage years he was studying in Japan and then went back home...you know, to be Jesus Christ.

The missing part of the puzzle, the part that the authorities don't want us to know is that...mmm, let's see how should I say this (I'll just say it): Jesus was not crucified he went back to Japan his lil' brother got crucified instead he settled in the mountains in Japan became a rice farmer did not do miracles, but it was agreed that he was generally a very pleasant person to be around and he lived to be 106 had wife and three kids oh yea his brothers ears and a lock of his moms hair are also buried there that is all.

There is this Wiki page and it has hella links. I have never heard of this until moments ago. This is so epic.

Teh Gay News

2011-12-27T08:49:00.000-08:00

I'll do another year in review post later, first up tho...Those powerful gays. Shit man, they cause erff quakes, tsunamis, hell, they probably caused the financial meltdown (and fo sho the war on women because they created hi-heals, right?). Conservatives finally have the proof that they need to show that teh gay actually does harm traditional marriage (that is where a woman and a man are married and the man totally dominates...dominates). Here's the proof....

God said "Traditional marriage only...that's what the bible says. I cheated on my husband."

It's a confession of sorts...in the form of an apology. John Medeiros on behalf of All Gay and Lesbian Minnesotans said sorry for making Senator Amy Koch (R) cheat on her husband. Dude said something like we apologize for our successful efforts to ruin your traditional marriage, ya know with all our gay marriage talk-n-stuff. Here's some money...

"We apologize that our selfish requests to marry those we love has cheapened and degraded traditional marriage so much that we caused you to stray from your own holy union for something more cheap and tawdry. And we are doubly remorseful in knowing that many will see this as a form of sexual harassment of a subordinate."

Well that is sooooo honest and heartfelt. I just wish that more people on both sides of the debate would be this honest. Sen. Koch was very vocal when gay marriage came up recently.

In other teh gay v. religion news...

Chicago Cardinal Francis George said that the upcoming 2012 Gay Pride Fest has the potential to be much like a...KKK rally. It was on Fox News so we know that it's true. Now I've heard everything.

Come back later for some Year In Review stuffs.

* Here's the letter. It's really epic and worth a read.

* KKK, err, I mean teh gay.

A Week OF...The Year In Review. Return to You

2011-12-26T10:21:00.000-08:00

So I hope that everyone survived, mmmmm, Isaac Newton's birthday yesterday. Yesterday was the first time in probably tens years that I did something on xmas. "K" thank you so much. I know, what the hell, is this atheist getting soft, or was I just hungry...both. I dunno.

As all you kind gentle and very good looking readers know it has been the most difficult year for me. I acknowledged my depression at this time last year, I suffered most of the year, I'm on meds now and for the most part everything is going really good (it sure was tuff that weekend Hitch died, but I'm over that now). In the middle of the hours, days, weeks and months of suffering I started, for better of worse, my failed project Nu Kriss Summer/Winter 2011. I recall always saying "The Phoenix arises from the ashes...but I'm still in the ashes part." Well now I'm not in the ashes part and if this is the Phoenix part..then fuck, the Phoenix kinda sucks.

I started the project because I needed something to do when I didn't have meds, then when I was waiting for the meds to kick in. I suffered outwardly (is that a word, it is now) and wore it on my sleeve. I'm a lot of things, but I'm not fake. Because of that, so many peeps gave me advice (some good, some bad, some that made me mad). I did the eat better, as well as don't do drugs, don't drink that much and exercise. One of the other thingies was that reinventing of myself that people are always talking about. A new me, a makeover for my soul, if I can say that and still be on the Team. The past few months I've literally have shed my skin. I have become new. Not only have I turned that metaphorical page, I feel like I've turned a novels worth of pages and I'm still not at the end of it, yet.

I haven't watched (or played) sports, or martial arts and I haven't played music or even listened to music pretty much the whole year. The one show I went to in early summer was ruined by my depression/anxiety. Hell, (formerly) my Forty Niner's are in first place after ten years of living in Suckville...and I haven't seen one game this season. For a while, and I wrote many posts on this, I contemplated changing into a full-fledged angry atheist. No more apologizing to liberal believers, no more splitting hairs between extreme and moderate religion. I still haven't decided what to do on that one, but if people started to see me as a Filipino Christopher Hitchens in new my unapologetic stance on religion...then awesome (juries still out tho). Why? I didn't know what to do. I thought change would be a good thing (and that is still up for debate) so I decided to do the opposite of what I have always done. Isn't that the definition of change?

So, I'm still Phoenix-ing and still shedding, but the other nite I played music for the first time in months. I was crapola and drunk, but it was an effort where there had been no effort whatsoevah before that nite. Another thingy I have recently done and fo sho I thought I would never do that again was think about...You.

Baby, I used to write You epic love poems where I poured out, what at one time I called, my Hearting. For a long time here every Friday was Love Poem Friday, then I turned it to "Friday, I'm in Love"....Then the depression happened and I had no more Hearting. Then after that there was no more You. About a month ago I was ready to leave town and never come back. I was not going to say goodbye. I was never going to see You or think of You again (I was fuckin' pissed at that time). But hold the phone...something is happening.

I have been thinking about You, again. And while I still want to move, I'm going to do it right, ya know, with a plan and all that shit (I really was gonna leave with just a backpack and very little money, no place to stay and no job. Like I said, I was pissed.). I guess change happens in mysterious ways. I do not know the destination of Nu Kriss, I just know that I'm on the road and that journey that people keep talking about is totally journey-ing right now...and You are back in my thoughts (dam, it's been a while baby).

...and ya know what, it feels good to be Hearting again. It feels good to think about You. Ya hear that, baby. That is the sound of a very large lady NOT singing.

* The epic epicness of Love Poem Friday. Honestly, I'm not capable of writing like this right now and I don't know if I will ever have enuff Hearting in my soul to ever write like this again. I'm just saying...I thought of You. Here. Here. Here.

The Earthly Father

2011-12-25T10:07:00.000-08:00

Even Atheist Cat knows Jesus wasn't born in the Winter.

First of all thanks to everyone for all the birthday wishes-n-shit and thanks for coming over and forcing me to drink that much. Yesterday I got outta bed twice, one to puke and once to take a shit (and just so you know...it was fantastic). I'm still outta shape right now, but that doesn't means I'm gonna skip the last installment of War On Christmas.

Jesus wasn't born on the 25th. Even conservative scholars worth their salt can admit the "authorities" back in the day hijacked the date of the 25th in an attempt to get those dirty skinky pagans over on Team Christians. That's not what I wanna talk about. What about Jesus' baby daddy, Joe.

Where is Joseph on the Christmas cards and nativity scenes. In the back or no where all all I tell ya. If fact how old is Joseph. He is barely in the bible, he has no dialogue in any of the gospels so WTF. Some peeps believe that he was young-ish, others believe that he is older and even a widower with previous chillin' the brothers and sisters of Jesus.

Joseph was actually a cool guy. After all, his old lady got knocked up by God and he still raised baby Jesus for like 13 years, right. And you know what all you angry atheists...that is a very nice thingy. He raised a child not biologically his and he still was very devout to God. I dunno, am I getting soft in my still hungover state. Gee, I really do think that nice.

I will point out tho...what about Jesus' teenage years. Are we to believe that the most important person in the world has no 'record' from (is it) 13-32-ish. This where conspiracy peeps will tell you that he went to India and studied Buddhism, and you know what, kind gentle and very good looking readers...I don't care.

Some questions tho. Where was Joseph during the crucifixion? Would not a father go to that. What about when dude was performing magic, errr, miracles, walking on water-n-shit like that. Dads are into that stuff. They go to little league games, pop warner, plays & band recitals. If I was Jesus' dad I would have been in the stands screaming "Yea, buddy, that's MY boy. Go "J". Go "J"" as he preformed various miracles...embarrassed the way that children get embarrassed when their parents do that.

Any who...Joseph seems like a cool dude. Obviously he must have died before Jesus died and he left Mary with some money, because she didn't get remarried which was the custom of the time. But just like the gaps in the life of Jesus (really where was he 13-32), we should consider the gaps in knowledge of the earthly father, Joseph.

Have a great loving, secular and godless day, everyone.

* I'm gonna puke right now, so no editing. Gross.

Thank You Peeps

2011-12-22T10:25:00.000-08:00

First of all, I want to say thanks all you kind gentle and very good looking readers for being residents of the place called, Awesome-ville. Yesterday, I went over 100,000 hits, which to me, it might as well be 100,000 kisses from (formerly called)...HER. It means so much to me that peeps find this place interesting enuff to come here day in and day out (esp. w/my mood swings, bad spelling, recent bitterness with only the occasional good post). I've always wanted to be a writer, even before wanting to be a rock star and/or martial arts baddass.

The first part of my life I have relied on, how should I say this, my hunky body, fantastic waist length silky black hair, oh and let's not forget my Asian good looks and thick lips of passion. As I age I wanna be known more for my brain (the one up top, not in my pants), my critical thinking and reasoning skills, my intellect and not just my rock hard sculpted body...to die for (and if we can have a few laughs along the way, then awesome sauce).

I'm a proud, card carrying member of Team Skeptic and Team Atheist. I believe in the atheist blogosphere and even tho we are not organized like organized religion, I believe we are all on the same team. We are diverse and come from many different types of backgrounds, but what we have in common is that we identify ourselves as atheist and skeptic. I've been on many teams in this lifetime and every team that I have been on...I have been the captain. Of all the teams in all the sports, in all the dojos throughout the decades, I am most proud to be on Team Atheist (aka The New Atheist). I really believe in this. I really do believe that this is the Golden Age of Atheism. And yes, I do believe that we are on the correct side of history. 50 years from now we will look back and say, just like the feminist said in the 70's..."You've come a long way baby."

So thanks for coming with me. I hope that we can learn together, stick together and when applicable, laugh together. Here's to the next hundred thousand...now let's destroy us some Xmas...beeotches.

Signed, the most humble person in the world,

Kriss

Sum Mo' War On Christmas...Please

2011-12-21T10:24:00.000-08:00

And...they own the entire entertainment industry and have the highest population of hot, liberal, bisexual women.

WTF, am I Korean in my mourning for My Hero. They are mourning their Dear Leader for ten days, but I'm a gonna say fuck it and be a...baddass and just continue (which was gonna happs anyways...). I haven't done any War On Christmas this week, so guess what...not chicken butt.

Lemmie start with the stupid Nativity scene. It's fake. First of all ain't no one gonna chill in some goat stall, with sheep and goat poo and have a baby, in the...winter. Palestine is hella cold in the winter. Besides that...

Joseph and Mary were *allegedly* walking to, where the fuck were they walking to, I forget (I'm doing this from my shitting memory-and my memory hasn't worked for months now-fuck)...They were supposedly walking to a different city from where they lived, in winter, while Mary is super prego, to take part in a census-a census where there is no record, when they kept pretty good records of that stuff even back in the day. Hogwash (1).

And breasts.

The Nativity Myth is in two of the four gospels, Matt and Luke; but they describe two different thingies, with different words and different scenarios. If the savior that everyone has been waiting for really was born in a wall less barn in the middle of a field in cold ass Winter, then wouldn't that be in all the gospels; after all it was all prophesied-n-shit. Well, unless it is what the cool kids call fakey fake fakeness.

They should have driven to the census. The ancients were so stupid.

Lemmie talk some shit about Mary (I'm in a bad mood, can ya tell). First of all...she was a hoe. She wasn't no virgin. You telling me my man Joseph wasn't, like, on her and inside her from the time they got married and before. Please. Howz about that myths of virgin births was a common theme for the ancients. Those playful Geeks gods were known to go down to da erffs for some of that good earthy white pussy that they liked so much. Ugh...was it Zeus that morphed into human form so he could get down with the earth ladies. I think so.

And you know what...something doesn't sound right about Mary all of a sudden discovering that she was prego. Is it in the gospel of Dj Matty-Matt that an angel told Joseph in a dream that Mary was prego (I think so. Remember, doing this from memory). But wait, innnnnnn, I guess, Gospel of Luke, once again an angel appears to Mary while she is awake and tells her that she is prego. So WTF. Is one gospel true while the other one is false, or are they both false (the latter).

Besides that, everyone knew Mary was prego because, and this is totally true, earlier in the day she was caught eating chocolate ice cream and a pickle simultaneously.

Should I go on...mmmm, I'll save some for tomorrow. Lemmie nutshell tho...The nativity is fake, the gospels are fake and Mary was no virgin (2). Have a wonderful day all you kind gentle and very good looking readers (esp. the ones who have stuck with me this year thru all my dookie brain stuffs. You know who you are.).

(1) Feels silly good to use a word that I have never used before. I'll take good feelings when evah I git dem.

(2) One more shoddy memory fact. Was it when the bible was translated to Greek that Mary became a virgin all of a sudden. All the cool infidel heathens know that, OK...I think I remember. It was Hebrew. the word is "alma". That meant young woman of marrying age. When it was translated to Greek because there was no word for that, that is when she became a virgin. Shit, OK, now I'm not that confident. Fuck it.

Fuck

2011-12-20T15:49:00.000-08:00

This can't be right. Why am I still crying...am I happy, sad...WTF. My atheist blogosphere homie, Steve at Left Hemispheres wrote this.

What the fuck.......

This one is for you, Hitch.

Philippines declares 'state of calamity' - Asia-Pacific - Al Jazeera English

2011-12-20T14:16:00.000-08:00

Philippines declares 'state of calamity' - Asia-Pacific - Al Jazeera English

Sainthood, Miracles and Wack a Mole

2011-12-20T10:09:00.000-08:00

Didn't the church f*ck up Native Americas back in the day. Oh wait, they were civilizing them (and raping them, and killing them and giving them diseases). So this morning when I wasn't playing wack a mole in my bed, and I was listening to NPR, I was so WTF...Pope Dookie Head started the canonization process for a Native American to become a saint. Ugh, I feel lazing right now, do I wanna go into all the details-n-stuffs (this is why I'm a stoner blogger and not a journalist). Ugh.

OK then, on to some of those pesky details (I'm not even gonna research this, I'm doing it from memory, so there) that make articles good and newsworthy. There is a boy that got into an accident and when he was in the hospital he got a flesh eating strep infection, the doctors said "sorry, this is all we can do", they are Native American so an elder suggested praying to Kateri Tekalwith, of the tribe that they are from-Lummi-because she was also disfigured by that small pox that came from whitey. Guess what, it frackin' worked. Or did it.

The boy, five year old Lil' Jake, got better. An elder came and "I pinned that relic (a coin with her image on it) to his pillow and I read that prayer to him every single day." Then lil' Jake was cured. Man oh man, that IS the definition of a miracle, which btw is one of the requirements to become a saint...which btw Kateri is on her way to become (so sayith Pope Dookie Head). Oh wait...one more thing. Lil' Jake was receiving the best medical attention at the hospital that he was staying at. So...WTF.

First of all Team Skeptic, if that is your/our real name, there is no such thing as a miracle. Fo sho there are miraculous events that do occur, but a true blue miracle, an event that defies the natural laws of the universe...well, that shit don't exist man. Admittedly, we may not be able to explain how Lil Jake's flesh eating disease just plain stopped, but to automatically chalk it up to a *miracle* is to insert that god that everyone keeps talking about into those gaps that skeptics keep talking about (which are also the gaps that science keeps filling).

Second...prayer don't workie workie either. That Study of Therapeutic Effects of Intercessory Prayer that Team Atheist keeps referring to concluded that 1) prayer had no effect on recovery and 2) the patients that were prayed for did worse. Yes that is, did worse. If you are on the Team and you haven't checked out that particular study, check it out, yo.

This is the result of Googling Pope Dookie Head.

So what is there, besides chalking up to " I dunno." What is there? The only thingy that really does exist, all you kind gentle and very good looking readers, statistics and probability (yippie). There was a chance of passing away for Lil Jake, but there was also a chance of surviving. Occurrences with the probability of 1-1 million happen several times a day. Weirder things have happened: the tornado that rips up a town, but that one house is untouched, cancer remission for no apparent reason and Lil Jakes strep infection just plain stopping (and now that I think of it, perhaps it ran it's course). Again, just because right now we cannot explain how the recovery happened, we do not have to go right for the miracle card. Miraculous yes, but to say it is a bonnafide miracle, like from God-n-shit, no way (1). OK back to Native Americans.

I think this song is romantico and I saw them in the early 90's and when they were playing they asked for weed and people threw joints onto the stage.

It always perplexes me when beautiful brown people accept and promote the very God, the whitey god, when dudes peeps fucked us up. Let's see, mmmm, slavery was ordained by God but then the very same God was used for redemption of the slaves. My Filipino peeps were all, like, kill-ed, raped and kill-ed some more by those Spanish and now the Philippines boasts (to my embarrassment) to be the most Catholic country in S.E. Asia. And now, because of Pope Dookie Head, we have the original nature loving hippies, the Native Americans, being canonized and sent down the road to sainthood.

Say it isn't so.

* Friendly Atheist

* The actual survey

* USA Today article

* Formely known as The Skeptics Dictionary For The New Millennium...I think.

(1) ...and howz about instead of claiming its a miracle, why don't we use the scientific method and solve this mystery. that is the difference between faith and science...the quest for truth.

* I don't know why that one paragraph is underlined. Revoke my Asian nerd card.

While We Were Alseep

2011-12-19T07:09:00.000-08:00

What the f*ck, if I wasn't such an atheist I'd say God(s) are against me. But which one(s): Apollo, Zeus or Thor (who fucking cares). I'am so saddened to announce that the man that generously put on this really epic concert I go to most years has passed away.

Warren Hellman, I do believe has was a billionaire, graciously hosted and paid for the entire three day music festival called Hardly Strickly Bluegrass. This concert is so epic that the last time I went (I skipped this year, ya know person problems-n-stuff) I thought that I might not go again because it's getting "too crowded."

So dude fo sho was a 1%'er, but he wasn't a dick about it. In fact he gave to his school (UC Berkeley), help the City is more ways than one and even said classic stuffs like "What the hell is the money for, if not for stuff like that (concerning HSBF)." Hellman is such a great guy that Speedway Meadows in golden Gate Park, the site of some of the best times of my life, will be renamed Hellman Meadows. Great tribute for a great man.

Speaking of a great man...The Supreme Leader, Kim Jong Il, passed away this weekend. Ugh, so much for that atheist utopian society...guess we all better become believers, right-wrong. Whenevah there is a theist/nontheist debate they always bring up Pol Pot or North Korea as examples of why we need faith in public life and not separation of church in state, after all, those are atheist leaders in godless states, right-wrong.

Is this racist of me...so what. Fuck you.

The Crusades were done in the name of God, these wars that we just left, in the name of God, North Korea NOT IN THE NAME OF ATHEISM. That is the difference: God equals kill and atheism only means no belief in God and no killing. We'll see what his butt ugly son will do after the Korean mourning period is finished (I believe it's like a week), or if he gets "coo-d" by some old school general dude.

Meanwhile in secular England, their Supreme Leader, the one that admits that he is a "committed" Christian, but also a "vaguely practicing" Christian, recently said "We are a Christian country and we should not be afraid to say so." Well, my second favorite (and I guess by default, he is now my favorite) Prof. Richard "Papa Bear" Dawkins has something to say about that (eat right and exercise Papa Bear, I can't lose you too).

Finally, I propose that we start a new calendar year and call it After-Hitch. So I guess today would be 0000-003AH.

That's all folks. Have a great week-n-shit like that.

...not ready...

2011-12-18T12:16:00.000-08:00

I'm not ready for the sun to set...

...I'm telling You, baby...I'm not ready for the sun to set. I'm not ready to call it quits.

* If I haven't used it all already...patience.

I'll Carry The Torch And Stick It Up Some Arse

2011-12-18T10:18:00.000-08:00

Will my hero's soul, whatevah that is, go to the big bar in the sky (because, err, after all, for blokes like us, that IS what heaven is), or WTF. Hitch's debating partner Douglas Wilson wrote a nice piece (and as far as I have read, all the religious folks have said nice things about Hitch-thank you), but he did mention that as far as My Hero's soul...well, we all know the rules right (renounce your evil ways, to enter the kingdom of God or something to that extent), and if you don't, as Mr. Wilson points out "he is lost forever."

Douglas Wilson was in the documentary Collision with Hitch and dagnabit...the guy is really smart. I'm not one of those New Atheists that does not give credit where credit is due. I am not a scholar or a public intellectual (as Hitch was often called), I'm just this dude that works in a cafe. I certainly do not like the way, let's say Dinish D'Souza, speaks about Team Atheist, nor do I agree that a one third god/ghost/man is coming back to do his thing "in our generation", but can dude whip my ass in debate. Yes (1). But does that mean a lay atheist like myself is defenseless against those big Christian/Jewish debaters. No.

I can't recall if I ever said this in Catholic school, but it really sounds like something I would say, or even what a normal inquisitive kid would ask and say. If one can recant their evil ways on their death bed, and accept the Lord, then why even practice in the first place, why even practice a religion, or any religion for your life. You go to the same heaven, right, whether you died a lifelong practitioner or accepted as that light quickly approaches. So...WTF. I know the theistic response, in fact I know several of them. That is not the point.

So I totally bro-crushed on My Hero. It really really....really breaks me up to hear that his demise is NOT greatly exaggerated (Really, I don't recall ever crying so much on one day: Grandma died, cat died, broke up with g-friend etc...). I kept thinking who is going to take his place. We need him, I need him. I kept thinking, who can take his place. It is not enuff just to be an atheist. Hitch was a brainiac, a writer, an intellectual and unapologetic. When he destroyed your argument he did it with style as well as thoroughness. Who can do that...not me. But that is OK....

If you are an atheist and you want to debate William Lane Craig, then you must have a Phd. (those are his rules). But to criticize religion all you need is what you already have-your evolved human brain. Little kids can come up with the example that I came up with earlier. You don't need a Phd. in ancient history (like Carrier) to point our there are many creation stories in Genesis. There are many empty tomb stories, many of the gospels contradict, who wrote the gospels, what happened to the early types of Christianity's, why were some gospels held back and kept outta the final bible. Read the bible and tell me that shepherds were chillin' in Winter when they saw that star. What is it I'm trying to say....

We may not be the next Christopher Hitchens, and it saddens my heart that there may never be, but that does not mean that we cannot contribute. Team Atheist is a team and everyone plays there role. I guess if I were the worlds most awesome evolutionary biologist, like Dawkins, then I would take that stage to promote modern atheism.

Traveling the atheist blogosphere this weekend I am so encourage to see the not everyday bloggers use this super sad moment to be inspired and pledge to blog some more. This is what we have to do to keep this Golden Age of Atheism going. Do your part. If my part is spending a couple of hours everyday writing my blog that may or may not reach up to 300 people everyday, then by golly, that is my part. Look at the way a person I have never met (and now, never will) has influenced me; we can all do this.

I guess what I scared of is that The New Atheist, the Team, my team, our team, will dissipate and disappear with the passing of Hitch, My Hero. Fo sho I am saddened. Fo sho this is not a good time in my personal life for this to happen (when is it evah). I don't give a shit. I promise, y'all, all you kind gentle and very good looking readers, I may not be the next Christopher Hitchens, but I am the current Kriss, and I promise you...(win or lose) I'm down for the fight for secular society. I'm in for the long hall.

Team Atheist Forever.

* Religion dispatches...Where will Hitches Soul go.

* Rabbi Wolpe also wrote a nice piece about dude. they debated 6 times. Couldn't find it tho.

(1) If you think you can beat D'Souza, W.L. Craig or Wilson is a debate then challenge them. Or Wolpe. c'mon now atheist, I don't see you name on the debate circuit.

The Ghost Of Jim Morrison

2011-12-17T12:28:00.000-08:00

Well, it's deemed authentic so I guess that is it. A photograph of rock historian, Brent Meiser, standing infront of the grave of Jim Morrison, with the ghost of the man himself, has been authenticated. Forget that it was authenticated by people that make a living from ghost hunting stuffs, this shit is fer real (or not).

For those on the team, Team Skeptic that is, we know about this thiing called double exposure (it was very lucrative back in the day), so...STFU. Here's the vid decide for yourself. Ghost, double exposure, pareidolia or bong smoke.

C'mon Jim "Break on thru."

Part of me wants to believe that Bruce Lee, Jim Morrison and Christopher Hitchens are chillin' in an eternal afterlife and they are all trying to "get on" Jane Russell...but I'm too smart for that.

Deja Vu-ish

2011-12-17T11:53:00.000-08:00

The totally not greatly exaggerated demise of My Hero, is a lot like when Jerry died; whether it is true or not, it's (at least feels like) the end of an era and a new beginning. I remember Andy and I trekked down to the City the weekend of Jerry's memorial concert.

You have to be a baddass to rock a Warlock. I play a Telecaster.

We were as poor as we are now, if not worse, and we had to hijack his Chevy Nova from the driveway of his parents house (even tho we were grown men). As we drove away Andy told me that the lie he told his dad was transparent and that "he knew", but I was selfish that day and probably said something like "It's gonna be cool, bro." The car had been sitting for a while, the paint faded, and even when it was running good, it still was not that good. Even tho we were grown men at the time, even tho we shoulda known better, we had the choice of (maybe) breaking down somewhere in BFE, or if the Gods so chose, making to this epic concert for that guitar player-that even guitar players like ourselves, admired (we are a selfish bunch, and hardly dish out kudos or compliments).

The car was ugly, rusted and untrustworthy. It had a sticker on the bumper tied on with twine that said "Awesome." When we went over the bay bridge I cursed the suspension because I was trying to roll a joint, and I only had a small amount of mushrooms, a joints worth of weed and maybe, just maybe enuff beer money for me and my equally alcoholic friend for part of the day. "This is gonna be so epic, bro," I proclaimed when I finished rolling our days only joint. "What," Andy tried to say over the blaring Grateful Dead music playing on his crap stereo and I just shook my head.

Well it's turns out the concert sucked. Previously we had been to the really epic Bill Graham memorial concert in Golden Gate Park (the best concert of my life, evah) and we thought we were in for more of the same. At the Bill Graham Memorial Santana played, Los Lobos, Robin Williams did comedy, Journey played, John Fogerty played Creedence songs with the Dead backing him up...and then the Dead played. That was the day of days. When those propeller driven planes flew over head and dropped red and white carnations all over the crowd, while the Dead were playing sugar Magnolia, and also while I was on a bathroom run, but I stopped to meet a redheaded, 19 y/o legal assistant (and we hugged and jumped for joy as the flowers rained down on us), I thought to myself "I will always, always remember this." Unfortunately this particular concert didn't go down like that.

Did I mention that I took three kinds of acid this day...and had the time of times.

We thought that the most epic bands were going to turn up but instead it was the essence of bands that used to be good with only one or two remaining members of the original band. Part of Dead shows was also how awesome the crowd was. The crowd was lame. After surveying the situation we decided to eat what little mushrooms we had...then we had a bad trip.

We decided fuck this "let's get outta here" so we got back into the jalopy to head back to Sac Town. "Let's go thru Haight and check it out." Fo sho, after all what would be a trip to the City, for guys like us, without going to the Haight.

I recall that the sun was out and that we had the windows rolled down. We both acknowledged that the shrooms were not "schrooming" so we decided to smoke the one joint that we had...oh, but it broke in my pocket and was unsalvageable. We had long ago drank all the beer, because there is never enuff beer for two guys like us and we cruiseded Haight Street smoking cloves (I smoked cloves back then.).

The streets were packed with jaywalkers. It seemed like there was no rhyme or reason, much less cross walks. The street was packed with cars also, apparently everyone had the same idea as us, and traffic moved at, like, 5mph (really). Hippies traversed between the slow moving cars like zombies, and so many of them, I can't emphasize how many people were in the street, and many many many said out loud "What am I going to do." Cloves smoke for a long time and we killed my pack even before getting to the Lower Haight. It was a relief to get outta there, get on 80 back to Sac.

We didn't say anything on the way back.

That is how I feel right now.

Goodbye homie, writer, intellectual, hero, master debater, eloquent defender of atheism...mentor. Goodbye.

I Read Snopes for Some Laughs

2011-12-17T09:59:00.000-08:00

Dam, that could me/us.

You know when you are with a kid and you pass by a parked car with a dog in the drivers seat and you lie to them and say, "Hey look, that dog knows how to drive," and the little kid with his/her little kid brain is in awe and says a kid "wow." Well, now it's not a lie. Dog in Australia caught driving. Funny comment was dude said something like "even we think this is weird."

Dam, it looks like there is a grandma and kids on the shitty weak ass roof.

Dude ask's for his "weed back" and the judge says "No."

Even the "beautiful people" could not escape the flooding.

This guy's dog told him to rob a house and he said no...that is until Jesus also told him to rob the house. Thanks Jesus. Oh yea, why. He told police that he was going to meet Taylor Swift in the backyard and marry her. OK.

I'm sure I covered this story before. Man gets jail time for sex with a horse. The thing about it is, I'm not sure if it is the same guy or a different guy. Could there be two of them...please no.

This is weird. Man punches grandmas dog. That is all.

Do guys even like this. Gross.

I think I just solved a crime. This guy was pissed and deposited urine into his bank deposit and this guy pissed on hella books. Could there be two of them. Please, no.

Illegal logging and mining is a problem in S0 PI.

OK I solved another one. Stolen goat gets shaved is the same person that horse fucker is. Right, or are people that weird and there's many of them.

Man urinates on police car. OK, nows there's three of them, potentially.

Most people live like this.

Meanwhile, in the Philippines at least 436 people have died due to flooding in the southern islands. Cagayan de Oro City received a whole months worth of rain in 12 hours. These are all pictures from Cagayan de Oro City.

* Snopes.

The Last Of The Heroes, Fuck

2011-12-16T18:51:00.000-08:00

He didn't like Dj Mama-T. I think he called her a fraud, or sunthin...

This is Hitch 101...but then again, they all are.

Nothing to add to this.

Because he is an awesome journalist, he volunteered to be water boarded. And that is also why I'm a blogger, not a journalist.

Some how I just don't think it will be this sanitary when it really goes down (isn't is supposed to be stinky-n-shit like that).

Why would one of the "cool guys" stay home Fri/Sat nite to watch theist/nontheist debates, when he (me) could be chillin', and I'll just say it...with drugs, alcohol and pretty ladies and music...my hero, Hitch.

He knew his lifestyle, admitted that it probably wasn't the most healthy choice...but freekin' "a" man, it was his choice.

No regrets buddy. Can I/you/we/us honestly look at our lifestyles and say there are no regrets

White suits plus that English accent equals automatic elegance.

This one is about Mayor Bloomberg making it illegal to bike without ye'r feet on the pedals or some shit like that.

I like this one. It's 1968 and he's getting arrested for something, but to me...it looks like a cool album cover from the Small Faces, The Who, Quadrophenia etc...

Books buddy. Literature , books, art, intellectual...WTF...oh yaz, he likes his drink (and so do I).

lll

Kind gentle and very good looking readers, as you know...it has been a shitty year. Just when you think it can't get any worse, it does and then it does again. Then you get to the point where you think "I'm gonna stop believing that it can't get any worse, because obviously..." Then it fuckin' gets worse again. Depression, anxiety, anger management, lack of feelings, too much feelings, there's not enuff sun, the sun that is here is no enuff, etc....

Then my hero dies.

This year I have, now, lost three people that I looked up to. In fact, they were the only ones. Hitch is the most devastating. The other two I'll go Asian and blame myself, but Hitch...fuckin' "a" man, even tho we have never even met...I still consider him/you my mentor. I couldn't write this earlier. I was crying too much. It's funny isn't it, that someone you haven't even met can have such an influence on you (me). Yea, funny shit (that crying uncontrollably in a restaurant when everyone is looking at you).

So...yea, I dunno what to say. I'm gonna pull myself up by those bootstraps that people keep talking about. I fell off the horse and now I'm gonna punch it in the mouth, bike-fall-up-again, it can't get any worse, a new day, another chapter, one day at a time, moment by moment, I'm gonna beat this shit, bla bla bla bla.....

Goodbye Hitch. You are my hero.

This Breakfast Beer Is For, Hitch

2011-12-16T11:14:00.000-08:00

Better Or Worse Winter 2011/12

2011-12-14T10:56:00.000-08:00

I haven't asked this question in a while...Is everything getting better or worse. When I was super small 4 year old Chris (not yet, Kriss) with that short Asian hair split on the side, the world was dealing with poverty and hunger. That OPEC oil stuffs was happening, terrorism and hostages were in the news and the distribution of wealth were all on the table.

We were promised a better tomorrow, after all that is why we were fighting wars back then, even in the 70's. George Orwell's 1984 scenario was NOT going to happen because as a species, humans were becoming enlightened (read "better") and as the world got smaller and smaller, at least the idea was, we would take care of ourselves more and more. Science and medicine were well on their way to eliminating curable diseases and technology was going the way of Star Trek-phasers and communication devices-n-shit like that). Hell, not only were we promised flying cars, but also (at least here in California), but we were promised a super fast train that could take us from San Francisco to L.A. cheaply and in the matter of hours. Again, we really needed that because we were going to solve the problem of dependency on oil and gas, and other countries.

Add caption

Well that shit didn't happen. If George Orwell were alive today he would say something like "Dam, now that's a police state (a good example is LA police department using drones to fly above neighborhoods and...do what evah it is they do-surveillance)." The Iran Hostage thingy that Carter had to deal with is just as common if not more common in the news today. We do not have cars that get 50 miles to the gallon, that much less fly and dagnabit...we're still trying to build that train to LA (sheez). Science and medicine did their part but an anti-vaccination movement thwarted those efforts (curable diseases are making a come back. thanks Jenny McCarthy-piece of shit, loser). We now have cell phones and computers and the wonderful Interbutz, but what happened to the humanity. What happened to people talking to eachother in restaurants and cafes?

So, is it getting better or is it getting worse. Time magazine just announced it's Time Magazine Person of the Year Award, and guess what...it's not me. The Protester is the person of the year. It was the dude in Tunisia that protested (unfortunately by lighting himself on fire) which started the Arab Spring (which has toppled governments). The battle between Tibet and China is on the world stage because monks protested (by lighting themselves on fire). The #OWS movement has not cured the discrepancy in wealth distribution, but it certainly is making an impact. It will certainly have an influence on how peeps vote this election. The Voice of the Protester is alive and vibrant. And of course I have to mention Team Atheist. The New Atheists protested the free pass that religion gets, we protested the privilege that religion gets-and look how far we have come.

So...is everything getting better or worse. Shit, I still don't know. What I do know, and I know this because my feelings tell me so, is that The Year Of The Protester is making, and has made the world a better place. Personally, I'm falling apart. The world, as it looks to me, is falling apart. Any yet, I have hope at this moment. What were whispers in the 70's has turned into a mighty roar. hope has a voice and hope will be heard.

I made a joke the other day that what the world needs right now is a Robin Hood type. Maybe that is what the Protesters are, and maybe, just maybe, I was right.

* Article USA Today

* Time Mag

Will Not Throw Shit For Beer And Laughter

2011-12-14T09:57:00.000-08:00

I'm not very laugh-y laugh-y lately, it's more like "Hey how come this isn't going my way or working (then I throw shit, like my fists)." So when I can remember that laughter that Robert
Plant mentioned in that documentary, not only do I have to embrace it...I have to go back to it and mine it over and over again (and when the feeling is gone, I go back to throwing shit.).

LoL God is made of the funny. I'm sure I've mentioned it before. Good stuffs peeps. Do yo' sef' a favor and go there and have a laugh. What you say, but Kriss, it's not scholarly. Kind gentle and very good looking readers, I know that and that is even more reason to go (me, I can read back to back essays on boring as shit that is so boring. it's OK to have a laugh once in a while.). Like this gem...

...or sometimes...it is thought provoking...

...and yet, other times, that science-y science comes into play. what is more awe inspiring than this statement.

I may be wrong on this one (after all there are so many atheist bloggers out there), but I do believe that Andy at Laughing in Purgatory (click the link in my sidebar and go directly there. UR welcome Andy) was having one of those debate/conversations last week-ish about using satire, or humor, or even ridicule to get our point across. One dude was saying, "No man, it's disrespectful" while Andy said, "It is effective." I believe it's effective.

Cartoons, editorials, photoshop, Lol Cats, anything, anytime, is a good and great vehicle to our point across. You have silly beliefs in a Gawd that is improbable, and as the sayin' goes...you guys know the rest.

Have a laugh atheist, you deserve it.